Attention all trinket lovers, your next must-buy piece of garbage has just arrived. For years, mom 'n pop stores (not to mention Cracker Barrel Country Stores) have raked in serious profits selling wooden animals with round knobs for feet, but now those manual farm-derived masseurs are likely out of a job. The USB Animal Massager ups the ante in a serious way by getting powered by USB, meaning that you won't even have to lift a finger as you watch that dog, panda or pig go to town on your toes or aching back. $10 spells relief (and embarrassment, but whatever).

[Thanks, Fanny]

Considering just how little vacation we Americans manage to take (and how stressed that usually leaves us), the only thing surprising about MC Square's X1 relaxation DAP coming here is how long it has taken. Nevertheless, those interested in picking up a snazzy new DAP and rocking some totally unhip goggles need look no further, as this system utilizes lights and sounds to "induce positive brain waves" and purge those negative vibes from your noggin. As for the player itself, it offers up a paltry 512MB of internal storage space, a miniSD expansion slot, image / text file viewer, voice recorder and an oh-so-vital biorhythm indicator. 'Course, for $399.99, we'd probably just pick up a new console, call in sick, and look a lot less foolish when ridding ourselves of Earthly burdens.

[Via ZatzNotFunny]

Having trouble finding the time or place to relax? Feel constantly wound up? Looking for a way to have fun and relieve stress? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you might be alive. Additionally, you may also be interested in Vyro Games' PIP -- or Personal Input Pod. The premise of the device is simple: via Bluetooth, the teardrop-shaped biofeedback sensor relays your stress levels (measured in electrodermal activity, or sweat production) to software on a mobile phone, where it's used to control a simple game. The outcome of the game is dependent on how relaxed the user can get, and the program continuously monitors the player's stress levels and reacts accordingly, helping them develop control over the relaxation process. No word yet on price, or when the PIP will be available... but we're not going to stress out about it.

[Via Impress]

Takara Tomy's been known to offer up a few oddities, and while the UMINE projector (shown after the jump) may not be the most cockamamie device to escape its labs, it does reek of something sold on a shameless late-night infomercial. Regardless, this portable toilet, er, mood projector reportedly beams images of beach scenes, waterscapes, and various other soothing atmospheres onto your ceiling or wall, which apparently helps you to divert your attention from the demands of reality (or yearn for a vacation). Of course, we've all ideas that this thing doesn't really turn your entire room into a theoretical paradise as the images so perfectly depict, but it might not be a half bad way to zone out for just $84.

[Via AkihabaraNews]

If you think the weekend was meant for kicking back in your ZipConnect Massage chair, or that uber-comfy Aeron apparatus for those fortunate enough -- we completely agree -- but Ronda's Media Chair makes even the most technologically advanced seats look like child's play. Sporting a stylish, modern design with questionably tall armrests, the Media Chair comes pre-loaded with a personal computer and a good reason to never leave the safe, familiar confines of your living room. Hanging off a polished aluminum swing arm is a fanless PC packing a 1.0GHz Intel Celeron processor, 512MB of RAM, Intel's 855 GME integrated graphics set, 20GB hard drive, built-in stereo speakers, USB 2.0, and the obligatory Ethernet / WiFi connections. You also get a 10.4-inch 800 x 600 resolution display, mini keyboard with integrated mousing device and "background illumination," and can get connected even in remote locations thanks to the optional UMTS unit. While we aren't quite sure how much coin you'd have to lay down to pick up this masterpiece of furniture design, we're sure the feeling of having everything you need all within arm's reach is indeed priceless.

[Via Uber-Review]