Amazing Allysen: animatronic dolls keep getting weirder

If you haven't already guessed by the unusual number of Hello Kitty, Tickle Me Elmo, and MystiKats posts that have graced these pages, we've got something of a Peter Pan complex going on around here; we're even more embarrassed to admit that whenever we come across a toy that's even remotely autonomous, well, there's no small amount of bickering about who gets to cover the story. The newest does-it-all doll to hit stores and Christmas lists this holiday season is Amazing Allysen by Playmates, followup and big sister to the company's last trip to the Uncanny Valley, Amazing Amanda. While Amanda was just a toddler meant to be "mommied," Allysen is a full-grown tween designed to replace your child's peer-pressuring real-life friends, and like most 10-year-old girls these days, loves smoothies, sporting the hottest new fashions, and gabbing on her cellphone. Allysen can perform all the same neat tricks that Amanda does -- responding to vocal stimuli, contorting her plastic face into "lifelike expressions," and recognizing her own accessories -- but steps up her game by actually remembering little details about her overlord BFF (birthday, hobbies, favorite smoothie flavor) and including those facts in future conversation. The $99 doll has already started trickling into stores along with several of her "sold separately" peripherals, and while you can pick up several expansion packs, it seems that her cellphone is limited to the pre-programmed ringtones -- which actually isn't a bad thing, because the day they start selling 'tones for dolls' non-working phones is the day we fall off "the grid" and move into a rustic little shack in Montana.

[rdrr @ Oct 9th 2006 11:07AM]

hehe, line of the day...

"because the day they start selling 'tones for dolls' non-working phones is the day we fall off "the grid" and move into a rustic little shack in Montana."

[tekdroid @ Oct 9th 2006 11:08AM]

both Allysen (??) and Amanda are scary. Was this intentional?

There was much bickering in the boardroom when the names were being tossed around, as I understand it. Half insisted she be named Scary Mary.

[disciple83 @ Oct 9th 2006 11:20AM]

if people are so hard up for friends that they truly have to make their own, what is happening to the world?

Does anyone remember that Seaquest DSV episode (as in the goofy water-based Star Trek starring that asthmatic punk from Sidekicks, Jonathan Brandis) in which the sub found some wormhole to the future to where there were only two people left alive in the world, (the futureistic Adam and Eve) and they were destroying the world with giant remote control mechs? They couldn't even use a verbal language they had become so socially disconnected. I hope I am long dead before that happens.

[zwartble @ Oct 9th 2006 11:22AM]

start looking in montanna - you know its gonna happen

[will @ Oct 9th 2006 11:30AM]

the storyline of toy soldiers is becoming less and less far fetched...

[clicclic @ Oct 9th 2006 12:13PM]

Okay that was funny. Cookies for everyone!

[Wayne D. @ Oct 9th 2006 12:31PM]

Hey! I used to live in one of those shacks!

[Fireman54 @ Oct 9th 2006 12:58PM]

Anyone remember Chucky?

[Anthony Spears @ Oct 9th 2006 1:55PM]

This reminded me of an article on Wikipedia regarding the "Uncanny Valley," which refers to the creepiness of these robotic dolls. The article says, in summary, that the more humanlike a robot is, the more positively we react - but when a robot is just short of reaching human likeness, it falls into the uncanny valley. This is where creepy-looking dolls, robots, and videogame characters fall. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Uncanny_Valley

[dj mcmanus @ Oct 9th 2006 2:15PM]

Is there a valley theory for the willingness of men to have sex with it?

The curve might be a little different.

I'm only stating this for scientific reasons.

[telepheedian @ Oct 9th 2006 2:16PM]

Kid: Hi Allysen! What's your favorite smoothie flavor?
Doll: Like, Habanero!
Kid: What do you like doing for fun?
Doll: Oh, I like to like, collect AK-47s!
Kid: What is your birthday?
Doll: Like, February 29! (doll's cell phone rings with industrial death metal) Oh! that must be like, MY DERANGED BOYFRIEND!

Artificial intelligence is fun!

[number40one @ Oct 9th 2006 4:18PM]

"overlord"

for some reason, i'm having trouble containing my laughter. people in my office are giving me looks.

[AbbydonKrafts @ Oct 9th 2006 4:28PM]

OMFG! That is hilarious, including the comments. I'm about to fall out of my chair!

[Dr Chaos @ Oct 9th 2006 9:24PM]

ah, now the sex slave industry will be booming!

[Thor K. @ Oct 9th 2006 10:38PM]

I'm already in Montana... and I will never leave, especially after a post like this! All you big city folk will get yours before those of us in Montana.