CE-Oh no he didn't, part XXXV: NBC sez piracy hurts 'corn growers'

Although some may argue that piracy is (at least on some level) beneficial, it looks like NBC has taken that sentiment to the opposing extreme with its latest comments. In a purported filing with the FCC calling for enhanced regulation of the internet in an attempt to stifle evil P2P activity, NBC blurted out a string of text that it surely hoped would be overlooked. Alas, hardly any ridiculous claims go unseen these days, so now we're faced with this gem: "In the absence of movie piracy, video retailers would sell and rent more titles. Movie theaters would sell more tickets and popcorn. Corn growers would earn greater profits and buy more farm equipment." There's absolutely no need for us to pick apart the aforementioned quote, after all, we're fairly certain the absurdity shines right through on its own.

[Via TechDirt, image courtesy of Monsanto]

[Yayaja @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:19PM]

Not to mention that the price of corn has recently doubled because of increased demand from the new Ethanol/Gasoline regulations that bush has put into effect.

[Charles R Hamilton @ Jun 22nd 2007 10:07PM]

So are you saying President Bush is causing piracy, or just high corn prices? Or are you just a kool-aid drinker who blames everything on the President?

[granny down east @ Jun 22nd 2007 10:56PM]

Judging from the amount of acreage that has been planted in corn this year in our area (instead of the usual soybeans and tobacco), I wonder if the price will actually double or if it will be a smaller increase.
And if the availability of corn for popping decreases, does that mean fewer Americans will go to the movies, and therefore, more piracy will occur?
We had better rethink this whole energy-independence thing.
/sarcasm

[ryan @ Jun 22nd 2007 11:58PM]

Umm. No. I live in Minnesota, where the majority of corn exports come from, and the price of corn hasn't fluctuated at all. You really have no idea what your talking about. Just another Bush Basher...

[John Laur @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:38AM]

This man knows nothing about agriculture and seemingly less about popcorn. Although millions of bushels of popcorn varieties are sold each year it represents a trivially small percentage of total corn production. Any unsold product grown as popcorn has plenty of other uses if for some reason the food companies don't buy it to sell as popcorn -- you can still make it into corn syrup, cattle feed, or ethanol -- not to mention that it has an extraordinary storage life.

Simply taking actual facts into consideration you could probably make a better argument that movie piracy in actuality has a net positive effect on the popcorn industry. According to the US Popcorn Board, 70% of popcorn is consumed at home and 30% at fairs, cinemas, etc. Given that movie piracy simply shifts the viewing location from theaters to home environments, it would not be unreasonable to suggest that the same amount of popcorn will be consumed by movie viewers no matter what the level of piracy becomes. Now if you eat popcorn at home, not only does it cost you a mere fraction of the price of movie theater popcorn, but you end up putting more money directly into the popcorn industry. Do you think a popcorn grower or popcorn distributor makes even $0.01 off of that $5 popcorn bucket? It's doubtful. But they probably take home $0.40 on a $0.50 bag of the microwave variety. That is a 40 fold increase in profits. If you also take into account the fact that watching a pirated movie with your date (while you eat popcorn at home) would save you about $60.. well you might pop another bag or two. There is a good case for a 100-fold increase in popcorn industry profit potential here; maybe the popcorn industry should attempt to actually PROMOTE movie piracy!

[John Laur @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:38AM]

Ryan buddy you need to get your facts straight. First thing; your state is #4 on the corn charts and produces less than 10% of this country's corn. I'm not sure what you mean by "majority" but I think we must disagree on our definitions.

Secondly, the price of corn (CBOT front month contracts) has gone from ~$1.80 in Q4 2005 to over $4 1Q 2007. I'm not sure what kind of voodoo math you are using to work that out as "hasn't fluctuated at all" but to me it looks pretty well like the price increased by over 100% in about a year! Do you remember last summer when a barrel of oil cost pretty much the same as it does this summer but our gasoline prices were a lot lower? Yeah maybe that has something to do with the fact that the 20% ethanol content of regular gas has doubled in price.

[david @ Jun 23rd 2007 11:49AM]

bush sucks but not because of corn or ethanol. There are better things to lay at bush and cheney's feet. I think the poster was make an anarchist joke, maybe.

[Don @ Jun 25th 2007 12:47PM]

Charles R Hamilton, you are an idiot.

What he was saying is that the corn growers are not in dire straits, even less so now that there are new ethanol provisions being signed into law.

You might want to turn off Fox, take a break from your classes at Liberty 'University', and put down that issue of the "National Review Online" for a while and READ WHAT HE WROTE AND THINK rather than reflexively defending your poster-boy.

[macstrat @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:20PM]

there has to be some award for statements that are full of jackassery like that

[mentalsticks @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:28PM]

"With the advent of movie piracy, consumers spend more time in front of their tvs/computer screens and eat more fast food. Taco Bell sells them more tacos and enchiladas. Corn growers earn greater profits and buy more farm equipment."

[TheGuy @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:29PM]

Wow, no wonder NBC is last in ratings.

[Preston Wily @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:37PM]

Hahhaha - sounds like NBC skipped their college logic class when they were talking about straw man arguments...

[shimman @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:42PM]

solution to the all piracy is to lowering the price with less restrictions; why would anyone try to get pirated contents if contents are inexpensive & offer better quality than the alternatives.

just keep on adding more stronger & annoying drms & previews, commercials, warnings, and other annoying restrictions to the content. people will walk away to either drm free contents like books or the alternatives

nowdays, i don't know which is better product; legit copies or pirated copies. in the end, it is those idiot copyrights holder who are killing farmer & themselves NOT the pirates

[boe @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:46PM]

I'm glad NBC pointed that out. I remember that time I wanted to have popcorn at home when I was watching a pirated movie but the cops came in a took away my popcorn so I never tried that again. I still have the pirated movie but I won't try to buy popcorn at the grocery store and actually have some fresh stuff with real butter at home - that is a NO NO!

[A-ron @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:50PM]

The lack of forethought in these press releases is truly astounding. Although it would have been interesting if they had gone so far as to attempt to figure out if less piracy would lead to more ticket sales or more dvd rental/sales and thus, if it would be more giant, $15 buckets of popcorn they would be selling, or if it would be jiffy pop reaping all these un-pirated rewards.

[jamesc4312 @ Jun 22nd 2007 7:58PM]

This is going to get picked up by some Professor somewhere and used as an obvious example of 'flawed logic'.

But anyways, either that guy will not comment at all, or he'll sayd that it was a 'metaphor'. Yeah, sure it was. Way to zero the infinitely small credibility the anti-piracy groups had.

[Dave @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:01PM]

Corn growers have had a free ride in this country for far too long anyway. They put high-fructose corn syrup in everything--and I'm tired of it. Also, there are devil-worshiping kids in the corn fields--so the sooner they're gone, the safer we'll all be.

[Joe @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:25PM]

I've also heard that devil worshipers practice in graveyards and elementary school playgrounds. Should we get ride of those too.

Case and point, STUDY LOGIC!!

[Jake @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:51PM]

Joe: for the sake of the internet, please add "Children of the Corn" to your Netflix queue.

[Joe @ Jun 22nd 2007 9:59PM]

Jake: Why would I get it from Netflix? I can just pirate it.
http://btjunkie.org/torrent/Children-of-the-Corn-Movies-1-7-all-DVD-RIPS-www-IPTorrents-com/3780863c203685742ba855278ff263c9c507dab539e3

[Kunikos @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:31PM]

"Case and point, STUDY LOGIC!!"

Case in point: study humor (and grammar)!

[Beebop @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:31PM]

Piracy keeps people from driving to the theater so often, and reduces the amount of corn that needs to be shipped.

More piracy is the solution to global warming.

[Kunikos @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:38PM]

... or legal digital-distribution! :)

[sh @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:42PM]

Open-source corn growers have known about this RIAA-Big Corn cabal for years. Why do you think they call it a "kernel?" Being able to freely breed, hybridize, and genetically alter your own corn is the sacred right of every corn user. And the mashups are fantastic.

[stephen @ Jun 22nd 2007 8:59PM]

haha, cutting out piracy would maybe net them an increase in corn sales by 10-bushels....as an industry.

Its a movie habit shift, people watch at home. Pirated or no.

[Ted @ Jun 22nd 2007 9:06PM]

The truth is money talks. Whether NBC is pulling it out of their *&* to make a point or not, they will more than likely get their way.

The man on the street has no interest in his own plight or in reigning in big business.

[AKBlade13 @ Jun 22nd 2007 9:14PM]

I know this is somewhat off topic but can't we have a CE-Oh No He Didn't" Award for THIS year's Engadget Awards?

Anyway, I find this funny and agree with the statement: There's absolutely no need for us to pick apart the aforementioned quote, after all, we're fairly certain the absurdity shines right through on its own.

AKBlade13

[Mac Dub @ Jun 23rd 2007 4:53AM]

Here Here! I second that motion!

[AKBlade13 @ Jun 23rd 2007 4:46PM]

Thanks for the support. If this DOES go through I better get credit for this :)

But yeah that statement "Does not compute" as computers and Bender would say.

AKBlade13

[Ryan @ Jun 22nd 2007 9:28PM]

I didn't realize that the $5 bucket of popcorn I got at movie theaters was actually made of real corn. It takes more like it was man-made, sort of like Twinkies. Oh, and yeah, this has got to be one of the stupidest arguments against piracy I have ever heard.

[Ignatius @ Jun 22nd 2007 9:32PM]

I think the best statement by a CEO was that one for Seagate, they use their hard drives to buy crap and watch porn. Now that's how you run a company. XD

[Sean @ Jun 22nd 2007 9:33PM]

That's funny, I just finished watching a downloaded copy of the entire second season of Lost and I ate about a bowl of popcorn with every 3 episodes. If I didn't have the option of downloading it, I probably wouldn't have watched it at all. If I hadn't of watched it at all, I wouldn't have consumed the popcorn. If I hadn't consumed all that popcorn, the corn growers wouldn't have been able to buy new farm equipment.

So, from my point of view, the corn industry is well supported by the P2P networks and the delicate relationship between NBC and the corn growers isn't as fragile as NBC would have you believe...

[Monoto @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:23PM]

Exactly. I ALWAYS eat popcorn when I watch movies at home. But when I actually go to the theater, it's a rarity for me to get popcorn because it's so dadgummed expensive.

[Chuckles McGee @ Jun 22nd 2007 10:27PM]

Yar, this piracy costs corn growers a buck-an-ear.

[kojo87 @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:02AM]

by this logic, movie piracy is saving the environment. by downloading Spiderman 3 i am not going to the theater in my Hummer. ergo i am the better person.

[kojo87 @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:03AM]

by this logic, movie piracy is saving the environment. by downloading Spiderman 3 i am not going to the theater in my Hummer. ergo i am the better person.

[kojo87 @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:04AM]

by this logic, movie piracy is saving the environment. by downloading Spiderman 3 i am not going to the theater in my Hummer. ergo i am the better person.

[BigD @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:35AM]

It should also be noted that a great deal of the RIAA and MPAA's top pirating universities are in corn producing areas....

Don't these kids know that they are affecting their parents and neighbors?

[nickroz @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:37AM]

so is the RIAA going to be taking my Caterpillar and Monsanto stock?

[ethana2 @ Jun 23rd 2007 3:00AM]

Actually, the entire "Hummer-theater-environment" argument is valid evidence of why our copyright models are bad for everyone AND the planet they live on. Sad isn't it? I think so. Keep on with your merry torrents. Sooner or later, the industry will get with it.... I hope.

Make me pay $10 or $20 a month on top of my broadband connection. Give me access to everything ever made. I'm waiting..... because pain-free online access to everything is what we will have, whether you get our money or not.
Seriously, though- that's $120 to $240 a year from every person in america. If that's not enough money, what is?

Who's with me?

[Russ @ Jun 23rd 2007 8:50AM]

oh, man - i feel terrible - from now i'm going eat loads of popcorn everytime I watch a torrented movie!

[James Sonne @ Jun 23rd 2007 10:07AM]

Piracy is in lieu of not having at all, not getting something legally. Those that steal do it because they are unwilling or unable to pay. Less piracy obviously does not affect the number of people that will pay for a product.

How many of you out there would have Adobe Photoshop if it were not pirated? How many of you would pay to own Adobe Photoshop?

[angelsvairwaves1 @ Jun 23rd 2007 12:45PM]

as an iowan, i need piracy.

i need SOMETHING TO DO.

[captain underpants and the bringdown gang @ Jun 23rd 2007 5:35PM]

Fucking idiots, popped-corn is the MOST EXPENSIVE (lb per lb) food on the planet. the popped-corn companies probabbly make a 800-900% profit on every lb sold.

[Blake @ Jun 24th 2007 5:54PM]

Yes, Piracy hurts corn growers. If people didn't download movies illegally, they'd go to see the movies in theaters instead. While there, they'd buy more popcorn, helping the American farmer.

I think they didn't dig deeply enough. If people were to start going to the theater once or twice a day in their effort to patriotically support the American farmer, piracy victim that he is, there would be a massive upswing in demand for ushers, ticket takers, and most importantly, concession stand workers. That would in turn drive up the wage offered as demand far outstripped supply for high-school workers.

Once the wage became attractive enough, students would start dropping out of high school, lured by the massive wages in the oh-so-lucrative field of popcorn sales.

Support education. Download a pirated movie today.

[Chris @ Jun 24th 2007 8:21PM]

the price of corn that is a concern to the economy is not the corn used for popcorn but for cattle feed and corn syrup and other things that we could do without. Grass is better for feeding cattle and sugar is a better sweetener, but currently both are more expensive that #2 corn.

references

http://www.csmonitor.com/2002/1031/p17s01-lihc.html
http://www.amazon.com/Omnivores-Dilemma-Natural-History-Meals/dp/1594200823