Turns out, "as soon as possible" meant "three minutes later." As of this very moment in time, the handheld is available and in stock over at the world's most recognized e-tailer, with the outfit confirming to us that sales "have been reinstated." At any rate, we suppose this serves to clarify one thing while bringing about a totally separate question -- there's nothing physically wrong with the 3DS so far as Amazon's concerned, but how on Earth is its inventory team reacting that quickly?
"We received customer feedback that there may be an inventory issue with the Cosmo Black Nintendo 3DS. The integrity of the product is not under review. Customers are still able to purchase the Amazon.com offer of the Aqua Blue Nintendo 3DS, however the Amazon.com offer of [the] black Nintendo 3DS has been removed until the inventory issue is resolved. There is no problem with the Cosmo Black Nintendo 3DS units themselves. This is an internal inventory problem that was brought to our attention from customer feedback and we are looking into it and will resolve as soon as possible."