Amazingly, those plastic MPT SmogBuster Fuel Discs don't improve fuel efficiency

Just in case it wasn't clear before, scientists would like to  reiterate that those MPT SmogBuster Fuel Discs you're supposed to stick to your gas tank to improve fuel efficiency and reduce pollution

don't actually work. We know it's hard to believe that the plastic stickers, which retail for $299 (as in two hundred and ninety-nine dollars), don't actually emit "holographic frequencies into the gas tank and change the molecular structure of the gasoline," but you're going to have to just take this one on faith, ok?