While we question the ability of McSweeney's to integrate classic Nintendo characters into a major-league squad, that's just the scouting report that's been released for this truly fantasy baseball roster.
For instance, you've got a young shortstop who spends way too much
of his time with "fairies" in Link and the token female pitcher (albeit one with a built-in arm cannon) in
Samus, but these inclusions will always be overshadowed by that of the stocky plumber stalked by rumors of steroid
abuse. Way to go, Mario.
Then again, the most controversial cameo probably comes in the final comparison between Coach Donkey Kong
and Ozzie Guillen with regards to DK's "inability to convey audible words or coherent directions to his
team," as well as his willingness to back his players when there are close calls (and get thrown out of the game
when the barrels start to roll). We hope no one gets overly offended by the reference, overt or unintended.
Nintendo help for your fantasy baseball team
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