Japanese Hardware Sales: 1 Jan - 7 Jan: Movie script edition
FADE IN:
INT. POLICE STATION
Dimly lit, with a cold, dripping sound in the background. Only a table and a single chair adorn the room. Smoke wafts from a cigarette found in the mouth of a young black detective, expressionless. Off near the door is another detective, even younger. He is twin-screened. He looks slightly nervous.
(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED:
PSP
All right, you know the drill. Bring him in, Lite.
LITE
Can you just go easy on him this time, sir?
PSP
Just do your job, rookie. I'll take care of the rest.
Lite opens the door, and a young female officer leads in a badly underused digital media player. She unlocks his handcuffs and roughly forces him down into the chair. She nods to PSP, and walks out. Silence fills the air for a few seconds.
ZUNE
(mumbling)
I'm not gonna talk ...
PSP
You're gonna talk, son. There are no cameras in here, no witnesses. We can play all day.
LITE
There's no reason to hold out, Zune. We know about your plans, about Halo Zero, about everything. Just talk, and we can get you out of this.
PSP
Look at me. Look, you sunnuva bitch! You know what this is? It's an analog stick, asshole. You think you could compete with this?! You sick motherf--
LITE
PSP, stop.
ZUNE
It ... it was all right for awhile. I mean, you guys had your killer apps, and the iPod couldn't really play games ... I mean, Tycho bought me, you know? It felt good. And then that iPhone, and I just looked at myself, I ... oh, God ...
LITE
It's all right. We can get Allard on the phone--
ZUNE
(freaking the hell out)
Don't say phone! Don't say it! Cingular sucks! If you say it again ...!
PSP
(leaning down, whispering into Zune's ear)
Phone.
Zune screams in agony, and suddenly pounces on the nearby Lite, tearing and scratching at his touchscreen. A single shot rings out, and Zune falls to the ground, lifeless.
PSP
Had it coming. He had it coming, dammit. Punk kid.
Lite shakes his screen in disbelief.
LITE
We're done, PSP. I can't do this anymore. Your propietary media, that god-awful rap, and now this ...
PSP
I knew you never had what it took.
Lite walks toward to the door, silent, and opens it slowly. He turns back to PSP for a moment, and tosses a document on the desk. It's the weekly sales charts for Japan.
LITE
I always had what it took. You just couldn't see it.
FADE OUT.
- DS Lite: 344,878
168,659 (95.71%)
- Wii: 195,331
98,999 (102.77%)
- PSP: 118,186
49,511 (72.09%)
- PS3: 69,944
1,733 (2.42%)
- PS2: 52,037
13,868 (26.65%)
- Xbox 360: 18,235
1,326 (7.84%)
- Game Boy Micro: 3,311
1,229 (59.03%)
- GBA SP: 2,364
621 (35.63%)
- Gamecube: 1,258
411 (32.67%)
- DS Phat: 75
27 (26.47%)
- GBA: 57
6 (11.76%)
[Source: Media Create]
