Japanese hardware sales, Oct. 19 - Oct. 25: Time travel sugar rush edition

Hey, guys! How was your Halloween? Good to hear! Well, we've been up eating candy for roughly two days straight now, and whoa man do we love Whoppers. The malted milk chocolates, not the burgers, which are okay, but that malted milk chocolate is the jam. Some dude came up to us yesterday, and he was like, "Hey! Stop eating so much candy! You're an adult!" You should've seen us, we just opened up a new carton of Whoppers — they come in cartons, remember — and just slammed them in like four seconds.

Unfortunately, our fructose binge caused our particles to vibrate at a frequency which dislodged us from the timestream, and kept us from experiencing linear time like the rest of the world for about 60 minutes. It was a pretty terrifying experience, but to The Hershey Company's credit, it says right there on the box: "Warning: Shotgunning an entire carton of Whoppers may dislodge the consumer from the timestream for one hour." Well maybe next time you shouldn't make such a delicious product. Think about that. Mister Hershey.

So. Anyways. We've been trying to read about String Theory and stuff all day, but it's hard to turn the pages of a book that's one hour in the future. Luckily, we're really slow readers. Well, we can't feel our hands anymore, so it's probably time to put the ol' Whopperoonis down, and tell you about the Japanese hardware sales figures for this week before we go into a coma. See, both of those Pokémon gamjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjjj

- DSi: 42,199 7,945 (15.84%)
- PSP: 32,865 7,235 (18.04%)
- PS3: 29,977 919 (2.97%)
- Wii: 25,917 4,824 (15.69%)
- DS Lite: 6,550 1,096 (20.10%)
- Xbox 360: 4,470 1,144 (34.40%)
- PS2: 1,951 182 (8.53%)

[Source: Media Create]

See: The malted archives