Dammit, Logan. I'm glad it's your first day working at this coffee shop; congrats on getting hired and all. But dude, seriously, I don't have time to waste waiting for you to fish that beard hair out of my coffee. I'm "latte" enough for work as it is. That's why, for a full week, I tried switching from my normal intake of three to four caffeinated beverages a day to Eagle Energy caffeine vaporizers. Oof, my heart is still racing.
Eagle Energy vapes are self-contained atomizers that operate much like Blu disposable e-cigs or the Blackout X hash pens, except that it's loaded with caffeine instead of nicotine or THC. Each EE pen measures about five inches in length and is maybe a half-inch in diameter. Inside, a small reservoir holds about 3ml of liquid and 0.08 percent caffeine per milliliter. This liquid passes through a small atomizer driven by a non-rechargeable lithium ion battery where it is converted into a vapor and inhaled.
According to the included documentation, regular coffee drinkers will need about 10-20 puffs to notice the effects -- a figure I found to be pretty accurate during my testing. Each pen is rated to last about 500 puffs before the battery conks out, which seems about right as well.
Eagle Energy's kick comes from a mixture of caffeine (guarana extract), taurine and ginseng -- basically the same stuff as in a Red Bull. Unsurprisingly, these things taste uncannily like the popular energy drink. The vapor does not, however, contain sugar or calories. But man, these pens gave me heartburn something awful. Even when huffing the recommended number of times over a three- to five-minute span, I immediately felt as if I'd just chugged a Big Gulp's worth of espresso or a carton of apple juice on an empty stomach.
I also noticed that the kick didn't last as long as a standard cup of coffee. I mean I typically average a 350 ml mug of Peet's Major Dickason blend every hour for the first three hours of my workday with each cup's effects lasting around an hour. According to Caffeine Informer, a 16-ounce cup of this blend contains 267 mg of caffeine. As such, Eagle Energy's kick isn't nearly as potent as the coffee's. There isn't the sip-sip-wheeeeeomgthisisawesomeImhavingeverythoughtinthewoooooooorld feeling you get with a good cup of coffee. It's subtler and less of a jolt, though that also means there's less of a crash later.
Overall, I rather like these things. They're obviously never going to be a 1-to-1 replacement for my morning coffee and I can't absentmindedly puff on it as I would a hash pen, but for a mid-afternoon pick-me-up or an emergency morning kickstart, you could do worse. Eagle Energy is currently running an Indiegogo campaign to fund both the 3-pack and 10-pack options, although the company's rep has assured me that it will move forward with the 3-packs regardless of whether the campaign funds. They're expected to retail for $9 apiece, $20 a 3-pack and $75 for 10.