Danish troops equipped with MP3 pillows

musical pillow

Seeing how things could, um, be going a little better over in Iraq, it's not surprising that the Danish army has equipped its troops with a secret new weapon designed to completely obliterate remaining insurgent outposts. No, this is not some fancy sniper detector, or even one of those crazy killbots being designed by the South Koreans; rather, the Denmark Royal Defense College has issued a total of 20 MP3-playing pillows to overseas troops (10 each to Iraq and Kosovo) under the guise of easing the soldiers' battered psyches. The pillows have built-in speakers that pipe out soothing instrumental ballads and nature sounds (called MusiCure), and have been certified by the International Red Cross as the most humane way to smother one's enemies (we made that last part up). As with other technologies designated as dual-use, however, we have a sneaking suspicion that the Danes are actually using these musical pillows to blast tunes from their Nordic brethren ABBA to the far corners of Baghdad, incapacitating hardened insurgents with the sweet, soulful sounds of "Mama Mia."