Caption contest: Teddy bear torture -- the photographs the FCC didn't want you to see

Hide the children, folks. We've just uncovered some atrocities, and we don't think they're appropriate for the preschool-and-under crowd. The FCC is performing unspeakable acts of torture upon this Step n' Shine "Snuggle n' Shine" bear, and we think it's time the public knew about it. More gruesome pics after the break.

Chris: "We're going to ask you one more time: where is the spurious 2400MHz radiation coming from?" or "Repeat after me: Bounce has a fresher scent than Snuggles. That's all you have to do."
Paul: "How about now, huh? Do you still 'wuv us vewwy much?' Didn't think so."
Don: "I see you, Tickle Me Elmo. You won't get away with this!"
Josh T.: "Reaction to Build-A-Bear's new competitor was mixed."
Nilay: "Where is the one they call 'Teddy Ruxpin'?"
Josh F.: "This was to be my final hit, but let's be clear about this. There's final hits and final hits. What kind was this to be?"