David O. Russell talks about his vision for the Uncharted movie

We're gonna deliver this news quickly, like the hasty removal of a Band-Aid: David O. Russell's Mark Wahlberg-fronted Uncharted film adaptation isn't off to an awesome start. After Wahlberg confirmed his involvement last week, Russell spoke to the LA Times about his vision for the film, saying:

"This idea really turns me on that there's a family that's a force to be reckoned with in the world of international art and antiquities ... [a family] that deals with heads of state and heads of museums and metes out justice ... We'll have the family dynamic, which we've done in a couple of movies now. And then you take that and put it on the bigger, more muscular stage of an international action picture, but also put all the character stuff in it. That's a really cool idea to me."

Russell added that the pace at which the film's development is moving along is "a locomotive," and that he's already penned about half of the script -- meaning there's plenty of time to just like, sit back, spend some time with the two already very movie-like Uncharted games, and just like, reevaluate some stuff. Specifically, all of that stuff you said right there, about a family that doles out justice to museum owners. That whole ... part. Everything. All of it.

As a fun experiment, we added some other, totally made-up quotes about other film projects Mr. Russell (O'Russell?) might be interested in. Join us!

Ludwig: "I was really inspired by the idea of examining society and politics in a more primitive context, with the world's first government being set up during the stone age. That combination of satire and sight gags is really going to work for Rock Band."

Richard: "Coming of age stories have always intrigued me, the kind of film where a young man finds out who he really is. And while he may not find love, at least he can learn to love himself. With that in mind, I couldn't possibly turn down Metro 2033."

JC: "I'd been looking for the right project to collaborate on with Robin Williams -- and there it was. Tekken."

Richard: "I'm really turned on by the idea that there's this group of teenagers -- and they have a dog -- that investigates haunted amusement parks and start a traveling band ... did I say haunted? I mean amusement parks on the brink of foreclosure. They rebuild the rides, slap on a new coat of paint and then put on a concert, all in a peppy montage. And the best part: Alan Wake is played by Robert Pattinson!"

JC: "A young man spends his whole life searching for his father, and when he finally meets him on the battlefield in World War II, his dad only has time to say one word before a mortar shell kills him: Dig Dug."

Griffin: "I have this idea for a Crash Bandicoot movie where a UN diplomat falls in love with a New York meter maid. It really turns me on, that idea."

Richard: "No one has ever really told the story of how the first labor unions came about. My vision of Def Jam Rapstar will change that."

Ludwig: "Has anyone really wondered what kinds of pets aliens keep? No, but they will once they see Metroid."

JC: "When I was eight, I was trapped in an elevator with a man who had just mugged me. It was the most traumatic experience of my life. I think I was able to tap into that feeling of fear when I was writing the script for Sonic Spinball."

Dave: "It's all about this house cat who gets separated from his family during a camping trip and stumbles upon a gateway into a fantasy world. Now he's got to fight to get his family back. I'm calling it Bubsy 3D. It's going to be in 3D."

JC: "I'm really jazzed by the idea that there's this Little League baseball team that's made up of misfits and delinquents ... this group of kids that really gets turned around by this new coach, you know? That vision is what really attracted me to the Crackdown franchise."

Chris: "I love this idea that there's this high school science teacher making these crazy experiments and, when some of the students sneak in at night and accidentally travel back in time, they manage to completely mess up our present. And that's why I'm so excited to be working on this adaptation of Half-Life."

Richard: "Communist China is such a mysterious, closed off society, so I couldn't say no to Bubble Bobble."

JC: "Three words: Kane. Lynch. Claymation."