Sumotori Dreams is how my wife and I will now settle disagreements

sumotori dreams screenshots

I've known about Sumotori Dreams for quite some time now. It's one of those internet curiosities you can stumble upon, fall in love with, and then forget about all within the span of an evening. It's a sumo wrestling simulation where two blocky combatants shove each other until one of them falls down or flies out of the ring, and it's been around on PC since the mid 2000s. Now it's on iOS, and I couldn't be happier.

You can play three different modes: Player vs. Player, Player vs. AI, and AI vs. AI. When the round starts, your wrestler stands up on wobbly legs and simple and it's up to you to use the on-screen button controls to shuffle towards your opponent and push them over. This is much easier said than done, however, as the character in Sumotori are prone to stumbling without reason and will fall over on their own more often than not.

sumotori dreams screenshots

If you wish to play against another human player, the control buttons will be cloned on both sides of the screen, letting you and your opposition fight it out on the same device without much trouble. Watching the inept adversaries square off is hilarious, and the player models are both realistic in their reactions and horribly uncoordinated, making for an interesting mix of conflict and comedy.

Staying true to its somewhat glitchy PC roots, the game is a bit buggy right now on iOS. The startup splash screens are incorrectly formatted for the iPhone, logos don't line up where they should, and the phone status bar hasn't been removed, so it runs over the top of some on-screen buttons. None of this gets in the way of the fantastic core gameplay, but the game could definitely use a bit of polish with an update.

When you see a screenshot of Sumotori Dreams, with its super-basic graphical style and featureless characters, you might no grasp how delightful the game can really be. Seeing it in action and actually playing it will open your eyes, and I promise that you will find yourself giggling in no time. It's probably the most fun you can legally have for US$0.99.