Bill Gates getting knighted

We were sorta hoping he'd show up for the ceremony wearing a suit of armor made out of discarded Windows ME CD-ROMs, but Bill Gates was officially knighted by Queen Elizabeth earlier today.

P.S. - It's officially time for another caption contest. The winner will be made a Knight Commander of the Most Excellent Order of the Engadget Empire.

[Andy @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Is it an iShuffle.. is it.. is it ???"

[Ryan Block @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"What the hell did you two order? What, do you think I'm freaking made of money?"

[alex @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Your Highness, I believe you'll find this to be a most generous offer for this island of yours."

[Pedro @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Abort, Retry, Fail?"

[Scott Newman @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Now do the monkey-boy dance!!

[Shane @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"I didn't have time to finish typing it before you got here. Word kept crashing!"

[Nate @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Mr. Gates, this is a just a piece of paper. In order to make your Knighthood official we will require you to purchase a Certificate of Authenticity for $3 Million USD."

[Brian Peiris @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Hehehe, well, yes it is a very large sum of money, but unless you can get my soul back from Satan, I'm afraid I can't sell you Microsoft."

[matt @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"oh, the keys to your 'quaint' empire. *coughmine'sbiggerthanyourscough*"

[James Avery @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Now for the powerpoint show..."

[Nate @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Hmmm... Everything on the menu looks so good! I think I'll have Wales with a cup of British Breakfast. Will you take a traveller's check?

[Giri @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"So these were the Brit's plans for taking over the world... hmmm. Thanks!"

[Peff_D @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"No... umm... no, its nice! really... I don't have one of these Queeny... yeah... I mean... I'm sure it was hard for you... "What DO you get the richest guy in the world...?" Hahaha, I get that all the time... yeah... umm...


...do you still have the receipt perhaps?"

[James Avery @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"By accepting this knighthood you hearby agree to the following terms and conditions"

[Seth @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Queen Elizabeth: "Cake or Death!"
Bill: "uhhh..I'll take the cake, please."

[brian @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Bill: "I'm sorry your royal highness but this looks like a hardware problem. You'll have to call product support just like everyone else"

[Mario @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

No Your Majesty, this is not the valid Key we're asking you for demonstrating you're a legal Windows user.

[Jay @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

YOUR SOULS ARE MINE! MUHAHAHA!

[Tuning Sensei @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Now, if you want to continue to be a Knight after your 30 day trial, you'll have to call and activate your knighthood. Sorry bub, can't do it online anymore."

[MacLeod @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Bill: 'You spelt 'night' wrong, but spell-checker wouldn't pick up on that, so I'll let you off...... Opps, my bad! All is 'tickety-boo' as you would say'

Queen: 'One cannot resist free OS upgrade!'

[Adam @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Queen : "We had to print this from a Linux PC because the Windows PC kept crashing."

[Robert Fleming @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

I'd like to buy england, I think this will about cover it

[Ian Jardine @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

I am sorry your Royal Highness, but I am not able to fix your Apple.

[Pat @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Oh man! Knights have +5 against normals and +3 against Steve Jobs with special 'iPod resist'! So where's my buckler and broadsword?"

[Ryan @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"... and with this check Bill Gates officially buys the UK and in turn fulfills his dream to turn the UK into a giant prison where he will send those who fail to run windows..."

[Skippy @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

This isn't a light saber! I'm supposed to get a light saber!


(I vote for entry #11)

[Carmi @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Thank you, Your Majesty, for this lovely leather-bound datebook. Have you ever heard of PocjetPC?

[Carmi @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Thank you, Your Majesty, for this lovely leather-bound datebook. Have you ever heard of PocketPC?

[Brett @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Yes Queen, it's the new Tablet PC, from Micro......oh wait it Crashed" *Snort Snort"

[Adam Yellin @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Mr. Gates, I just want to congratualte you on your excellent iPod! What? Steve Jobs! Oh I'm terribly sorry."

[brian @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Bill: "I'm sorry your royal highness but this looks like a hardware problem. You'll have to call product support just like everyone else"

[brian @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Bill: "I'm sorry your royal highness but this looks like a hardware problem. You'll have to call product support just like everyone else"

[CRWhitehead @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Bill: ...and in exchange for this gratious gift of knighthood, I present you with five units of MSFT stock.

[Justin @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"It looks like you're trying to become a Knight. Would you like help with the pompous ceremony?"

[Justin @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"I am the Knight that says Ni."

[Taylor @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

So what does a small place turned World Power go for these days? Would 512k be enough?

[ChillyWilly @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"The half-assed smile from Mr. Gates as he realizes there's no stack of money inside."

or

"'A Knight!', says Melinda (right) as she thinks to herself. 'I wonder if this will help us in the bedroom?'"

or

"Is there something amiss, Mr. Gates? I used Star Office 7 on our Linux system to create that certificate. I can get you a copy if you'd like."

[Abe @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Cool! An iPod with my name engraved on the back!"

[Connor @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Maybe a little long for a caption, but it's mostly fine print:

0. This License applies to any knighthood or other work which contains a notice placed by the copyright holder saying it may be distributed under the terms of this General Public License. The "Knighthood", below, refers to any such knighthood or work, and a "work based on the Knighthood" means either the Knighthood or any derivative work under copyright law: that is to say, a work containing the Knighthood or a portion of it, either verbatim or with modifications and/or translated into another language. (Hereinafter, translation is included without limitation in the term "modification".) Each licensee is addressed as "you".

Activities other than copying, distribution and modification are not covered by this License; they are outside its scope. The act of running the Knighthood is not restricted, and the output from the Knighthood is covered only if its contents constitute a work based on the Knighthood (independent of having been made by running the Knighthood). Whether that is true depends on what the Knighthood does.

1. You may copy and distribute verbatim copies of the Knighthood's source code as you receive it, in any medium, provided that you conspicuously and appropriately publish on each copy an appropriate copyright notice and disclaimer of warranty; keep intact all the notices that refer to this License and to the absence of any warranty; and give any other recipients of the Knighthood a copy of this License along with the Knighthood.

You may charge a fee for the physical act of transferring a copy, and you may at your option offer warranty protection in exchange for a fee.

2. You may modify your copy or copies of the Knighthood or any portion of it, thus forming a work based on the Knighthood, and copy and distribute such modifications or work under the terms of Section 1 above, provided that you also meet all of these conditions:

a) You must cause the modified files to carry prominent notices stating that you changed the files and the date of any change.

b) You must cause any work that you distribute or publish, that in whole or in part contains or is derived from the Knighthood or any part thereof, to be licensed as a whole at no charge to all third parties under the terms of this License.

c) If the modified knighthood normally reads commands interactively when run, you must cause it, when started running for such interactive use in the most ordinary way, to print or display an announcement including an appropriate copyright notice and a notice that there is no warranty (or else, saying that you provide a warranty) and that users may redistribute the knighthood under these conditions, and telling the user how to view a copy of this License. (Exception: if the Knighthood itself is interactive but does not normally print such an announcement, your work based on the Knighthood is not required to print an announcement.)

These requirements apply to the modified work as a whole. If identifiable sections of that work are not derived from the Knighthood, and can be reasonably considered independent and separate works in themselves, then this License, and its terms, do not apply to those sections when you distribute them as separate works. But when you distribute the same sections as part of a whole which is a work based on the Knighthood, the distribution of the whole must be on the terms of this License, whose permissions for other licensees extend to the entire whole, and thus to each and every part regardless of who wrote it.

Thus, it is not the intent of this section to claim rights or contest your rights to work written entirely by you; rather, the intent is to exercise the right to control the distribution of derivative or collective works based on the Knighthood.

In addition, mere aggregation of another work not based on the Knighthood with the Knighthood (or with a work based on the Knighthood) on a volume of a storage or distribution medium does not bring the other work under the scope of this License.

3. You may copy and distribute the Knighthood (or a work based on it, under Section 2) in object code or executable form under the terms of Sections 1 and 2 above provided that you also do one of the following:

a) Accompany it with the complete corresponding machine-readable source code, which must be distributed under the terms of Sections 1 and 2 above on a medium customarily used for knighthood interchange; or,

b) Accompany it with a written offer, valid for at least three years, to give any third party, for a charge no more than your cost of physically performing source distribution, a complete machine-readable copy of the corresponding source code, to be distributed under the terms of Sections 1 and 2 above on a medium customarily used for knighthood interchange; or,

c) Accompany it with the information you received as to the offer to distribute corresponding source code. (This alternative is allowed only for noncommercial distribution and only if you received the knighthood in object code or executable form with such an offer, in accord with Subsection b above.)

The source code for a work means the preferred form of the work for making modifications to it. For an executable work, complete source code means all the source code for all modules it contains, plus any associated interface definition files, plus the scripts used to control compilation and installation of the executable. However, as a special exception, the source code distributed need not include anything that is normally distributed (in either source or binary form) with the major components (compiler, kernel, and so on) of the operating system on which the executable runs, unless that component itself accompanies the executable.

If distribution of executable or object code is made by offering access to copy from a designated place, then offering equivalent access to copy the source code from the same place counts as distribution of the source code, even though third parties are not compelled to copy the source along with the object code.

4. You may not copy, modify, sublicense, or distribute the Knighthood except as expressly provided under this License. Any attempt otherwise to copy, modify, sublicense or distribute the Knighthood is void, and will automatically terminate your rights under this License. However, parties who have received copies, or rights, from you under this License will not have their licenses terminated so long as such parties remain in full compliance.

5. You are not required to accept this License, since you have not signed it. However, nothing else grants you permission to modify or distribute the Knighthood or its derivative works. These actions are prohibited by law if you do not accept this License. Therefore, by modifying or distributing the Knighthood (or any work based on the Knighthood), you indicate your acceptance of this License to do so, and all its terms and conditions for copying, distributing or modifying the Knighthood or works based on it.

6. Each time you redistribute the Knighthood (or any work based on the Knighthood), the recipient automatically receives a license from the original licensor to copy, distribute or modify the Knighthood subject to these terms and conditions. You may not impose any further restrictions on the recipients' exercise of the rights granted herein. You are not responsible for enforcing compliance by third parties to this License.

7. If, as a consequence of a court judgment or allegation of patent infringement or for any other reason (not limited to patent issues), conditions are imposed on you (whether by court order, agreement or otherwise) that contradict the conditions of this License, they do not excuse you from the conditions of this License. If you cannot distribute so as to satisfy simultaneously your obligations under this License and any

[huh? @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

So, where's my complimentary "I've been knighted and all I got was this lousy chainmail shirt..." shirt?

[Bruce Davis @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Oh, I get it. It's a framed copy of the Blue Screen of Death. Neat-o cool."

[Dave @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

I believe it's pronounced "menage-a-trois"

[lemel42 @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

I didn't know PowerPoint *had* a kinghthood certificate template.

[steve @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Mr Gates, I'm returning these MS Licensing disks.

[jim @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"I have read your application to be a beta tester for Longhorn, looks like you are a perfect cadnidate to be the "master beta tester"

[Jack Phelps @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Look, I was gonna post one that was pretty good, but #32 there with the terms and all really deserves it so I won't even bother.

[Ed Hardy @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Your Magesty, is this a list of all the bugs you found in Windows XP?"

"Oh no, dear, that's just the index. The full list is several truckloads."

[Shawn Price @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

Hmm your still running Windows 3.1 over here. I think we can pencil you in for March 30 for the Windows ME upgrade. That is a state of the art operating system you'll just love it. Trust me.

[youdiejoe @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"I had the steamed veggie plate, and Melinda had the same... SOOOO that would be...let's see.....�6.99 for us, and Cornish Hen with herb potatos, 4 glasses of wine, a side of kidney pie and whatever that grey/brown thing was...I'm guessing that's you Lizzy @ �59.00. SO how do you want to do this? I don't think an even split will really work, obviously someone was ordering with their eyes and not their tummy, weren't they? huh?

[Ed Hardy @ Dec 19th 2005 12:11AM]

"Wow, I had no idea that a knighthood came with a complimentary slavegirl."