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FNR3: Let's Get Rrrready To Rrrretail!

Boxing fans looking to re-enact Shane Mosley's Saturday night beat down of formerly "Ferocious" Fernando Vargas were likely disappointed to learn (or at least be reminded) that Sugar Shane failed to make the Fight Night Round 3 roster after lacing up virtual leather in the two previous games. Then again, Vargas hasn't shown his battered mug in any of the Fight Nights, leading one to wonder: just how badly does a man's face have to get pummeled before the video game gods throw him a bone? (For those who didn't shell out for the pay-per-view, Mosley won a hard-fought TKO that left Fernando looking like the Mexican Elephant Man).

Granted, create-a-boxer can go a long away in patient hands, as evidenced by this home-brew ear-chewer. Sure, the financially shady nature of the sport makes licensing difficult and numerous omissions inevitable. Mosley could be missing due to his own greed and fading marquee. That said, when an otherwise quality title's "coolest" unlockable is a...Burger King ad, every unrendered tomato-can grates on the nerves. Hey EA, Don King belongs in a boxing game. The Burger King does not. Oh, and if you suddenly felt the urge to "Grab Life By The Horns" while pitting Hagler against Hearns, credit the smooth 30 DLPS (That's Dodge Logos Per Second) for delivering a subliminal knock-out.

I understand the economics at play here. Maybe we could have had George Foreman if they stuck a Meineke muffler up his ass to off-set costs. But boxing is one of my favorite sports and Fight Night Round 3 is thus far my favorite 360 game. Here's to the irrational dream that the next $60 installment includes more pugilists and less plastic-head product placements.