Guildwatch drinks your milkshake

There will be drama, and when there is, Guildwatch is there to ridicule and call out all parties involved. Because WoW is serious business! I've abandoned my main tank! I've abandoned my boy! I am the Third Revelation!

Whoops, got a little carried away there. Meanwhile, this week's look at guild drama, downed and recruiting from across the realms starts right after the jump. And be sure to send your tips to wowguildwatch@gmail.com -- this column flows directly from them like so much black, slick oil.

DRAMA

• What's better than a "congrats to us" message about downing Illidan? A "grats to us" message about downing Illidan that includes a drama-laden jab at an ex-guildie. Well done, Mediocre Men on Thunderlord. Read on to page two, where Lokideath himself shows up to post "the post you all have been hoping/waiting for." He doesn't disappoint.

• A couple of people sent this in, but it's just too strange for me, and I think the person who did it (Starlighte of Dragonblight on Gnomeregan -- yes, this is that story) is tired of all the attention, so I'll just give you the link and let you sort it out for yourself (explanation from the man himself on page 6). The short version: guy pretends to be a 15-year-old girl (complete with flirting behavior and rumors that "she" was bisexual) for fun, what surely seemed to him to be a funny joke gets way, way out of hand, and then the reveal happens and everyone realizes that (surprise!) we really have no idea who's on the other end of that character.

• Necessary Evil on Deathwing had the old-fashioned "guildies fed up with guild steal the bank and transfer off the server" drama. Is it just me or does guild-bank-ninja-ing need some innovation? How about someone joining a guild just to steal the bank? Or a secret santa who actually puts stuff into the bank and then transfers away?

• Subversion and Synergy of Triumphalism, both Aussie guilds from Spinebreaker merged to form a new guild called Bad Blood. Since merging, they've downed Gruul for the first time and Loot Reaver is officially on notice. Also, on Malfurion, Rawr is merging with Dark Colossus. The guild is continuing under the name Dark Colossus, and are working up to doing some official endgame raiding

• Adversary on Hyjal-A has been raiding for a little while, but recently, after a stall, the GM and one of the major officers split, which led to a chain reaction with four more officers leaving on a Sunday night. By Tuesday, the guild got disbanded, with various officers looting what's left of the guild's bank and transferring off server. Bummer.

• Just like TV shows, those Europeans have crazier drama, too. NSFW, although it's not like reading anything on the forums is.

DOWNED

• Motion on Exodar-H downed Void Reaver and Lurker Below to kickstart their T5 raiding run. Hydross is next.

• American Legion on Aerie Peak is an "all military or public sector government employee guild" (/salute), and they've downed Prince for the first time after skipping over Shade to do it. Don't worry, Shade got his -- they went back and nine-manned him after the priest got one-shotted early on.

• Destined on Ravenholdt downed Gruul's for a guild first. Grats! It was your destiny.
  

• Relentless on The Scryers-A, fielded a second Kara group this week, who went on to roll all the way up to Prince. High King Maulgar is on notice!

• Pandemoneus and Front de liberation on Stormrage-H have downed Vashj! Doomwalker and Kazzak also got shoved into early graves. Kael is on notice, as he's the only one left until T6.

• The September Movement on Arathor-H has cleared Karazhan! They've been at it since early January, so that's quite an achievement. Grats, guys!

• Death Wish SH on Shattered Halls had downed Anetheron, Kaz'rogal, Azgalor, and Archimonde all in the past week for server firsts. BT has seen their wrath as well: HW Naj'entus, Supremus, Shade of Akama, and Teron Gorefiend have all bit the dust there. Wow.

• Order of Thought on Malfurion-H continued their steady march of progression this week. Lurker is down for the count and the Lynx boss got declawed. Hydross is on notice, and they're still recruiting reliable healers if you're up for it.

• Schmitz n GiGGles on Greymane-H downed Void Reaver for their first T5 kill. They're also recruiting all classes for endgame raiding.

• Eternal Purgatory on Eitrigg has been running two groups through Kara for the past few weeks and is only lacking Netherspire to fully clear the raid. They've officially put Gruul's on notice, though, so Spitey will have to wait.

• Leviathan on EU Azjol-Nerub took Gruul down on the second attempt this past Sunday. Mag is on notice, and two group Karathon races are on tap as well -- they're just waiting for gear. They're also planning to have the raidleaders pick their own teams; just like in PE class back in school!

• Resurrección on EU Tyrande-H raced to get the server first kill, and did a little celebrating in Shattrath afterwards.

• Judgement of Lightbringer downed KT and are headed on to Hyjal They're also recruiting serious raiders.

• The Cyntex Alliance on Cenarius is a casual guild that has got two Kara groups going and is headed into 25 man content: HK is down and Gruul is next. Later in the week, they also dropped Halazzi in ZA.
  

• Lex Talionis on EU Maelstrom downed Kael a week after killing Vashj and are now 2/5 in Mount Hyjal. They're also seeking Paladins (1 ret, 2 holy), and please be Hyjal attuned.

• Amicita Cavus on Norgannon-A downed Leo for the first time and then followed that up by downing him again the next night on the server reset. Morogrim is on notice -- the guild has him at 50%.

• Warcraft Commanders on Shadowsong is a small, casual, "No Drama" guild that has downed all bosses up to and including Curator in one night on Karazhan. Grats!

• Escaped from Arcatraz on Executus-H downed Prince for the first time. Definitely an achievement, and they say they probably set a record for most healing gear dropped. But that's a good thing -- well-geared healers always makes a raid better.
  

• Disenchanted On The Spot (which, I'm not going to lie, got close to Best Guild Name, but not quite there) of Elune downed Lady Vashj. Since then, Kael's been to phase 3, so he's on notice.

• Valeria Victrix is a new guild on Thorium Brotherhood-H that's only about three weeks old but has already dropped Nalorakk, Akil'zon, and Halazzi in ZA. Gruul's on notice.

• Disposable Heroes of Dunemaul downed Lurker. Nice job.

• Redeemed on Burning Blade-A one-shotted Rage, downed Anetheron, Kazrogal and Naj'entus. Also recruiting a prot pally and a feral druid.

• An Army of Juan on Cenarion Circle has brought down the Prince. Nightbane has to die yet, and then it's all 25-man content for you guys.

• Southern Wardens on Proudmoore finished off Tidewalker.

• Relentless on Undermine-H lived up to their name: Leo, Hydross, and Kazzak all in one week.

• Evolution on Moonrunner-H downed Hydross and is now 3/6 in SSC. FLK is on notice.

• Highborne of Exodar has been rolling through BT and Hyjall. They've made it up to Shade of Akama and Gurtogg, leaving Reliquary on notice.

• Dusk Raiders on Cenarion Circle-A has killed both Rage Winterchill and Anetheron during their first trip to Hyjal. Naj'entus in the Black Temple is on notice.

• Ex Cinis Cineris on Farstriders-A has been taking names in Karazhan and erasing them just as quick! They one-shotted Illhoof and dropped Netherspite, and Shade has been downed and is almost on farm status. Prince is on notice, so he better watch his back.

RECRUITING

• Reverse Osmosis is a new, relatively casual, relaxed raiding guild on the new PvE server Cairne. They'd like to run both pre and post- BC instances, and possibly participate in the AQ War Effort if that goes down. Look them up if you'd like a new start.

• Motion on Exodar-H is also recruiting a priest for T5 content.

• Shibboleth on Rexxar-A is recruiting, since the "real life" monster attacked some of their members. They're a family/adult casual guild that's slowly working through Kara -- this isn't the guild you join if you want to be bleeding edge, rather it's the guild you join when you have some casual time to play and want some fun, mature folks to play with. Questions or apps go to the website.
  

• The Threat on Baelgun is recruiting for TK, SSC, and Mag content. They have Gruul's and Void Reaver on farm and have a few Karathons each week. Desperately seeking more warlocks and shaman to join in the fun.

• Phantom Slayers on EU Aerie Peak are recruiting charcacters of any class in better than Karazhan gear to help get our 25 man raids rolling.

• Mightiest of Beings on Gnomeregan-A is a 200+ member guild running Karazhan. They are currently recruiting healers for a second Kara team as well as more raiders for Gruul's. They're also taking on all classes for Kara keying and other Kara runs if the demand is there.

• Drunken Lullabies is recruiting on Skullcrusher. They're looking for the right 25man mix, which means more tanks (especially warriors and druids) and healers (especially druids). They run three days a week and you can apply on their website.

• Guardians of Destiny is an Italian speaking guild on EU Hakkar-A and currently looking for mages, a hunter, holy paladins, resto shamans, a shadow priest and three rogues. Not one or two, but three. They're working on Kael'thas, and you got to be mature, have vent, and be ready to raid.

• Fatal of Alleria was formed in December of 2006 as a Burning Crusade raiding guild and have since held the 4th spot behind such legendary guilds on their server like Dawn, Premonition and Risen. But they're back, and recently took down High Warlord Naj'emus and Supremus in short order. Now, they're looking for a restoration shaman as well as prot and ret paladins.

• Blood Bunnies of Doom is a raiding guild on Llane-H who is looking for quality players to become part of a core 25 man raid. They are seeking all classes and are especially in need of warlocks.

• Fires of Heaven on Coilfang was a guild spawned from Brotherhood of Destiny as a group of folks who wanted to start raiding more hardcore. So far they're working through Karazhan and ZA, and they're looking for more to fill out another Kara group and start 25 man content.

• Chaotic Precision on Frostmane-H is recruiting. They clear Kara as a guild weekly and take out HKM and Gruul with help from a few PuGs. They would like to get some good players and head into SSC/TK -- be ready to raid Thursday, Sunday and Monday starting at 9pm.

• The Forsaken on Draenor-A is looking for more guildies to play in a mature and family-friendly environment through Karazhan and into more casual endgame raiding.

• I'd Mana Tap That (winner of this week's Best Guild Name award) is recruiting healers and ranged DPS to begin 25-man content. Their roster consists of a lot of alts-turned-mains with experience up to Illidan and they're looking to head into 25 mans with the new guild immediately.

• Trouble on Draka is recruiting mature, helpful players looking to progress past Kara into 25 man content.

• Saturday Sunday is an Oceanic raiding guild on the Balnazzar server. They are looking to recruit additional members; specifically healing paladins, shamans and a shadow priest. Please be ready to raid and willing to listen to directions.

• Not Too Hordecore on Emerald Dream-H is a small, casual guild that has been hammering away at Karazhan with groups of mostly guildies for a few weeks now. But they are in desperate need of healers and ranged DPS (especially warlocks) that are level 70 for the rest of the 10 man and 25 man content.

• Artisans of War on Ravenholdt-H is recruiting roleplayers, particularly those who are interested in raiding. They need a healer (I smell drama, but they're not sharing, apparently, so if you know the story, tip us for next week), but they'll take anyone from level 1-70 who can RP their way through an in-character interview.

• Hannibal ad Portus is a new Spinebreaker-H raiding guild that needs five more for structured Karazhan runs. Specifically they need an MT, an offtank druid, and a mage, warlock, and holy priest.

That's it for this week's GW. Remember, the address to send your tips along to is wowguildwatch@gmail.com, and we're especially looking this week for drama tips that include a thread on guild forums -- it's been a while since we've seen a good one of those. Until next week, happy raiding!