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South Korea's first satellite: lost in space

Joshua Topolsky
01.06.08
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According to disheartening news out of Korea, the country's Aerospace Research Institute is reporting that they've lost contact with its first multipurpose satellite, the Arirang 1. The satellite, which was launched December 21st, 1999, is suspected of having encountered a mechanical malfunction or misalignment which would have affected power generation. "If the satellite loses proper alignment, its solar panels cannot generate power that is vital for the machine," said an "expert" -- which the source material suspiciously won't name -- which further reinforces our belief that the satellite was appropriated by an alien lifeform, for use in a bizarre mating ritual.