We've been railing against the LCPD for years, so it's nice to see a more mainstream publication like The Onion finally notice
what we've been saying all along: Liberty City's cops are the absolute worst. Just look at this statistic: "Since the surge in crime, which began on April 28 at midnight, more than 830,000 civilians have been murdered-nearly one-tenth of Liberty City's total population." Unacceptable.
It's even threatening to drive some people out of town! "Sure, we have excellent radio stations and an incredible range of things to see and do here," public defender Kiki Jenkins says. "But if I were younger, I'd move to Mario World
in a second." We hear you Kiki, we hear you.
[Thanks to everyone who sent this in.]