Top 5: Statements That Will Get You Punched in the Face By a Nintendo Fanboy

"To each their own." It's a simple rule that, if universally followed, could result in world peace. On the other hand, if people didn't go online to bitch at each other about video games, then many bloggers would be collecting unemployment. I can't speak for every other hobby that exists, but I imagine that fly-fishing and glass-blowing message boards are considerably more pleasant than gaming forums.

So as it is, the gaming world is chock full of debate. Hrmm, scratch that. The word "debate" conjures impressions of two well-groomed individuals standing behind podiums and taking turns eloquently addressing issues presented to them by a moderator. For every one of these moments, you get a couple thousand boring ones. But when the forum is switched to the Internet, the dialogue transforms into a partisan torrent of vitriol. While political campaigning may be viewed as a chess match between experts, an appropriate metaphor for gaming and Internet debate in general can be found in the gigantic brawl at the end of 1977's Slap Shot.

In particular, Nintendo fanboys seem to simultaneously be a large source of and recipients to such slander. Perhaps it's due to Nintendo's extensive gaming history (especially when compared to Sony and Microsoft). Similarly, many of these Fanboys grew up with Nintendo, with the NES and SNES occasionally acting as a babysitter. For some, an attack on Nintendo is equal to or worse than an attack on one's family. To such individuals, I say take it easy. I'm certainly not above the label of "Nintendo Fanboy" (look at the name of this site for crying out loud), but I do try my best to apply sound reason and understanding to such hostility. I now present to you a look at 5 common weapons used in battle against Nintendo, an analysis of each argument, and how best a supporter of Nintendo should respond.

The Top 5 is a weekly feature that provides us with a forum to share our opinions on various aspects of the video game culture, and provides you with a forum to tell us how wrong we are. To further voice your opinions, submit a vote in the Wii Fanboy Poll, and take part in the daily discussions of Wii Warm Up.

This article was originally published on Joystiq.