Caption Contest: The Network covers ground in a Smart car
By Darren Murph 
posted Feb 12th 2009 4:19PM
posted Feb 12th 2009 4:19PM
Sean: "With a requirement to cut costs and save cake, Verizon has hired Bob the Builder to do the work of thousands. New Verizon slogan: 'Yes we can!'"
Darren: "Anticipating an ambush from Chad and all his traditionalist friends, Verizon employees were forced to wear hard hats not just on location, but in transit."
Paul: "There's probably a smarmy guy with glasses in that car. Can you feel the anger rising within? You must learn to control that anger."
Chris: "'Small, slow, and easily destroyed' was not the corporate image Verizon was hoping to project with its road fleet."
Don: "Verizon was forced to quickly improvise after its first vehicle, the Storm-mobile, mistook park for reverse and met an unfortunate end."
Joe: "It's a long, lonely road out there -- longer and lonelier when your car is wearing a funny hat."
Nilay: "God, I hope no one can hear me now."
Ben: "Ironically, this Verizon Wireless driver was seen using a GSM handset while traversing the International Speedway."
Thomas: "My other car is a T-Mobile."
[Thanks, Evan]
i pity the poor man or woman who has to drive that car to stay employed
hell, where do I sign up? Getting paid to just drive around and probably listen to music all day, not too bad.
" You mean , All though's "network people" fit in there "
I kno right, especially if you drive one of them Google cars, you get to see all the sights, only thing that would suck about the google car is every street and Im sure youd go insane, but hell I would defiantly do it, cuz I can play music all day, and it passes my time so much, where da fuck do I sign up to
that's Dark Helmet's older brother, HardHat.
Exterminate! Eeexxxxterminate!
In this economy, at least he has a job.
You think that car is small, you should see Ntelos's
stupid cars these days stealing our most fashionable clothing accessories. well you know what?? im going to get myself a seat belt and use it as a belt.
yeah how does that feel Mr car??
There's my damn roller skate!
Looks alright to me.
Is that the Verizon Guy and Alltel Guy's new love mobile?
Strapped for cash after the alltel acquisition, Verizon has been force to 'downsize' somewhat.
It might not have been the SMARTest decision to put that hat on it.
OMG I KNEW someone would actually make a real life RC PRO AM car...
It's a thinking cap to make it even smarter!
The rival to Lightening McQueen in Cars 2!
Answer to the question "What's worse than driving the Nerd Herder?"
A smart car, once small and agile, now has a higher safety rating with it's new safety hats!
OMG I KNEW someone would actually make a real life RC PRO AM car...
Is it a portable femtocel?
"Don't worry I've got the network."
"COME ON GUYS ONE F***IN CAR! THATS IT!?
After realizing the SMART car was a completely stupid concept for a car, Verizon started installing thinking caps.
Before traveling down the International Speedway, Big Red stripped out the standard features from its SMARTcar. The result? I shitty phone. ehem. I mean car.
My Caption:
"When heading to Washington to ask for a bailout it's best to show just how desperate your situation has become."
Also, VerizonVerizon Wireless. They are two separate companies that are run very differently. Verizon and Vodaphone own Verizon Wireless. Engadget blurs that line too often, as they are not one and the same company. Those are Verizon (Land Line) vehicles in the picture and have nothing to do with Verizon Wireless. Now with that being said, that picture is too funny.
It should read Verizon != Verizon Wireless... System seems to not like brackets.
My Verizon Wireless phone has that exact same Verizon logo on it. Doesn't say "Wireless" anywhere. So can you really blame anyone for just calling both companies Verizon?
You'd think a car that small would get better than 35 MPG
"Can you hear me now? you can't...wait let me unplug my car from the wall."
The recession is no joke. Not only are they downsizing staff, they are downsizing vehicles. Whats next? a midget on tv saying can you hear me now?
Why does this picture remind me of the "22 Short Films About Springfield" episode of the Simpsons with the tall guy in the small car.
"Excuse me but do you have a problem with my automobile?" if I remember correctly (which is probably wrong anyways).
It missed the mark. Should be driving on the zebra crossing.
My caption... "The harhat is actually to scale"
The new Verizon SC2009 phone measures 72"W, 52 1/4"H, 36"D. VCAST NAVIGATOR capable. Make calls, text, watch videos. Can also be used as a transportation vehicle.
Yet another thing Verizon has managed to put their obnoxious red check mark on!
The only successful European device to get picked up by Verizon.
Apparently Verizon has a big deal with the Shriners!
What happens when they try to deliver a phone that's bigger than the car?
After Verizon promised "no dead zones" in their network, they realized they needed smaller cars to fight in tighter places. Can you hear me now?
it appears no one can make a highly ranked post on this one...
Nope. The recession downsized all captions too.
Yes we can?
OMG Bob the Builder and Barack Obama are one and the same!!!
never woulda guessed
Well... when you're addressing ALL of the American people, you need to be able to get down to their level.
ooooh burned
"Can you hear me now? Yes? Good. Can you SEE me now? No? Great!"
BTW... none of youse engadget writers made me chuckle. You all FAIL. OK, I'm being harsh... Nilay made me smile and Thomas got me to gurgle. Try doing a search on Amazon for books about "wit".
(lol... poking fun, dont take it too seriously).
Verizon's way of saying they are still one of us.
Because we all have Smart... oh. I guess not.
Or perhaps the same as Red Bull Suzukis, Truly Nolen V-dubs, and the Oscar Meyer Weinermobile?
Whereas odd little cars = attention = ADVERTISEMENT?
Although... anyone driving around in a Weinermobile must definitely be one of us.
And speaking of the Red Bull suzuki.... the other day I was coming out the gym and it was there and I swear 2 of the HOTTEST chicas came out of that thing, decked out in Red Bull gear from head to toe, handing out free Red Bulls. So yeah, I ain't knockin the Red Bull suzuki, not if that's what's behind the wheel!!! Now is making me wonder who's in that Verizon SMARTcar!???
The current economy situation has forced the city to remove automatic traffic cameras and is now training the police force in capturing pictures of wealthy network moguls known to speed in certain select residential areas.
"It's so hard being serious when you drive a car from Playskool"
or
"Verizon's entry into the advertiser-backed, long-awaited Twisted Metal prequel - TM:Schoolyard"
:D
my caption:
http://img131.imageshack.us/img131/2937/canyouhearmexm1.jpg