A pictorial guide to the subtle differences between small, cheap laptops

We've yapped it up with MID and UMPC makers before in order to figure out exactly what makes the two any different from one another, and now that lines are being blurred at a blistering pace in the ultraportable / netbook / low-cost laptop / undersized PC market, it's about time someone laid down some ground rules. Thankfully, there's no "discussion" necessary here -- just follow that flow chart above and you'll be an expert in seven to ten seconds flat. Guaranteed.

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:21PM]

nice one, engadget!

[3rdman Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:24PM]

Whew, finally got out of the I'm Stuck loop...somehow...I dunno how...uh...*runs*

[i Eye Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:59PM]

What happens if said Laptop has an Apple logo on it?

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:25PM]

Indeed nice and should be slightly altered and glued to the doors of every PC retailers out there. I've encountered to many people that want to buy those "cute" little laptops, but what they don't know, girls in particular, is that netbooks are not as good as a proper laptop. The difference in hardware is like night and day.

[Richard Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:48PM]

@iGoon#2: according to that flowchart, all MacBooks are ultra-portables. (well, same with all 13" laptops)

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 10:00PM]

But MacBooks are 13.3" which definitely isn't smaller than 13" so they are just plain old notebooks.

Don't feel so special now, eh?

:)

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 10:14PM]

its actually from the register ;)


**bottom left box**

[JeremyBenthem Posted Mar 15th 2009 2:41AM]

clearly a laptop should fit on your lap, a netbook isn't very good at that, if Psion wins the whole netbook litigation, netbooks should just be called notebooks, since they are pretty much the size of them, whoever started calling laptops notebooks is pretty dumb, or has really large notebooks

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 16th 2009 5:40AM]

I believe one of the reasons they started being called notebooks as opposed to laptops was to discourage people from actually using the computer on their laps after research suggested some health concerns (particularly in men).

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:24PM]

Brilliant!
Brilliant!!!!

- Drink Guiness.

[i Eye Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:08PM]

YES! it is brilliant!

The flow chart was disigned to fit perfectly on the iPhone screen!

[Smart People Play Tuba Posted Mar 15th 2009 1:47PM]

And learn how to spell "Guinness" correctly, blasphemer!

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 15th 2009 4:55PM]

my dog's name is guinness

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:25PM]

The MacBook Air is a "Plain Old Laptop!" lol. 13.3" screen screws with the chart.

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:40PM]

Of course its a plain old laptop. Its just a very thin laptop.

[dstafford72 Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:57PM]

I'm pretty sure 13.3 inches qualifies as 13"... in which case it is not larger and if you continue to follow the chart is a netbook. Makes sense I guess since Apple was kinda sorta targeting that market when they released it at Macworld 2008

[CheesusCrust Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:37PM]

MacBook Air would qualify as an ultraportable, not a netbook. AND DUMBASS 13.3 IS CLREALY LARGER THAN 13" .

[Bandit5317 Posted Mar 15th 2009 12:20AM]

Apparently it isn't that clreal.

[stoddcrew Posted Mar 15th 2009 1:52AM]

uh all laptops that are called 13" are technically 13.3" they just say 13 inch cause it's an easy abbreviation, all pc's that are 13 inch are also technically 13.3", unless in special occasions like sony's 13.1", but it's such a insiffnificent difference people just call them all 13"

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 16th 2009 11:31AM]

I don't know how you ended up with netbook by following the < 13" screen portion. The Macbook Air clearly has a video port (mini displayport.) That would make it an ultrathin. Doesn't that make a little more sense?

[Alex Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:25PM]

Hahahhahahahaha

I'm ->

[Alex Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:26PM]

There was supposed to be a less-than sign, followed by a dash and a Stuck, below the I'm ->. I guess that's engadget's anti-html for ya.

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:31PM]

Nice one, jerk

[i Eye Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:10PM]

AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

Noob
Nube
Nuub
Nub

[Smart People Play Tuba Posted Mar 15th 2009 1:49PM]

Peace, brothers and/or sisters.

[nowhereman Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:28PM]

geeneeus!

[M3Ki Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:29PM]

do you think he had fun while making this

[El Duderino Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:30PM]

Gahhhhhh, I don't want to give The Register props for that flow chart but...it's well done. :(

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 11:58PM]

Eh? What's so wrong with the Register?

[mondaymorning Posted Mar 15th 2009 8:15AM]

It's The Sun of the tech media world...

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:31PM]

Most netbooks do have video out ports... this is wrong!

[Electromodo Posted Mar 15th 2009 1:45AM]

Exactly! Acer Aspire One, for example, a well known netbook, has video port.

[Cragger Posted Mar 15th 2009 2:26PM]

the ASUS EEE 700 series, grandfather of the whole category, has a VGA out... that portion of the chart kind of breaks the whole thing.

[Alan Strangis Posted Mar 15th 2009 11:40PM]

The Register wrong? Say it ain't so.

Some commenters are suggesting the chart's supposed to be funny too, but I'm not seeing it.

[johnm Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:38PM]

Where does the VAIO P go?

Seriously, I own one and love it but I'm still not exactly sure what it is. Your chart calls it an "Ultrathin" but I really wouldn't call it that. I bought it thinking Sony was full of shit and I was buying a $900 netbook but after using it for awhile there is no way I would call it a netbook but I am not quite sure what it is.

[JW Posted Mar 15th 2009 4:43PM]

disregard the video port thing because that's just wrong (netbooks have video ports too) and the Vaio P is a netbook

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:39PM]

Am I the only one that thinks this guy is an idiot. Aside from the over the top excessively crude language; his flow chart is crap. According to him, my hp mini is a "ultrathin" I can tell you its not that thin and it over 500$ because I was an early adopter and I added a wireless n, blue tooth, 16gb ssd to it. And by the way, if a laptop is 13in w/ an optical drive, its a laptop. You don't need to add fancy language to it to make it sound like it's more then it really is.

[Derek Kessler Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:48PM]

Whoa, buddy, relax. It's a parody of the whole nonsensical segment branding the netbook craze has given rise to, not a serious attempt to quantify every small portable computing device on the market. Notice the "I'm Stuck" loop and the ladder (ala Chutes and Ladders).

[DirkDickbutt Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:53PM]

Excessively crude? Oh, you mean his one use of the word ass.

Ass ass ass. Ass ass ass.

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:58PM]

"Aside from the over the top excessively crude language"

Um? The chart says "ass" once. Is that really "over the top excessively crude language?"

[WebOn Posted Mar 16th 2009 1:39AM]

ass

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:44PM]

It failed for my thinkpad x60.

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:42PM]

so mac air is a laptop,w/no built in cd drice. sony tt is 12 inch that plays blu rays but is a netbook,,.,dee dee dee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:44PM]

Aaaargh Im stuck in the Im stuck!!

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:50PM]

I'm stuck I'm stuck I'm stuck I'm stuck...

:)

That is a hilarious flow chart, I lol'd at the "You've got a HANDHELD" "No" "Really? Lemme see it." "Look!" "You are holding a wallet, you dumbass."

[HOT LIKE FIRE Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:22PM]

... its not so funny when youre the dumbass holding the wallet :(

[Derek Kessler Posted Mar 14th 2009 10:25PM]

Or when your wallet is empty...

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 8:51PM]

Seeing how most "notebooks" classified as "netbooks" have video ports, this sequence fails almost every time.

[Devin Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:10PM]

Cute.

[(Unverified) Posted Mar 14th 2009 9:26PM]

sweet my macbook is a subnotebook

wtf