TO: Readers, RE: Memorial Day

RE: Memorial Day
ATT: meat.jpg (credit: sanctumsolitude)

To all members of the Reader Department [US],

It has come to the attention of Joystiq Management that today is Memorial Day [henceforth referred to as 'Memorial Day']. As such, we have learned that a great deal of our readership will be engaged in festivities ['Festivities'] and will not be coming to the office. As such, management is required to dispense pleasantries ['Pleasantries'] and good wishes ['Good Wishes'] to all members of the Reader Department [US]. Pleasantries and good wishes follow:

Happy Memorial Day to all United States readers of Joystiq. Go forth and gorge upon grilled meats [see attached] and spend time with your families. Also, please take this time to reflect on the sacrifices of all members of the armed services.

Additionally, should anyone from the Reader Department see a member of the Blogging Department partaking in Festivities, please tell him / her to return to work.

Enjoy the Holiday ['Holiday'],

J. J. Joystiq Sr.

This article was originally published on Joystiq.