Ask a Faction Leader: Sylvanas Windrunner

WoW.com's prestige in the community has afforded us the opportunity to speak with major Azerothian leadership figures on any subject, and we're letting you, the reader, Ask a Faction Leader!

We recently spoke to Chromie, ambassador for the Bronze Dragonflight, and he shed light on several key issues, including gender identity, dwarven futures, Mary Sues, and going back to the future. In this installment of Ask a Faction Leader, we'll be sitting with Sylvanas Windrunner, Banshee Queen of the forsaken.

Our first reader question...


Dear Sylvanas,

There have been rumors that your elder sister Alleria had a son with the Alliance paladin Turaylon. How do you respond to this?

Sincerely,
Wylendrin of Blackwater Raiders

Sylvanas responds:

With the opportunity to ask me anything, of course the blood elf paladin asks me tabloid questions.

I have a sister who most likely died facing the Burning Legion on Draenor. I have a sister who forsook her allegiance to Silvermoon for the company of humans. I have three nephews I will never know save for likely facing them in battle in the future. How do you think I feel?

Please screen your questions better.


My Queen,

With Varimathras defeated and the trust on our kind at all-time-low, the orcs have come to our city to monitor on our activities.

I do not get offended by that, but with all the reputation I've built for myself while being a proud member of the Forsaken, the way our people are treated is making me want to set an orc or two ablaze. I didn't become an ambassador to be treated like dirt and so I ask you: what are your thoughts about the orcish guard of Undercity? How long do you think this will last? And does it ever bother you?

Ambassador Sappermentti

Sylvanas responds:

The incident at the Wrathgate, which of course I had nothing to do with me whatsoever, has put the forsaken in a bad position within the Horde. As much as the Horde needs us for our foothold in the Eastern Kingdoms, we need the Horde if we want to keep Lordaeron safe against the newly-bolstered Alliance forces. Wrynn is proving a thorn in our side that needs to be dealt with, and we can't do it alone.

Yes, the Kor'kron overseers are a bother, but for the moment, we're in the doghouse and there's not much I can do about it. But we will get past it. In fact, I just received a message from Garrosh Hellscream with a deal in mind -- for all to be forgiven, all I have to do is claim for the Horde a certain port west of Silverpine.


Dearest Sylvanas,

Death becomes you. No really! I confess that I am jealous of your waist line. Please, please tell me your secret. My tier 10 exposes my problem areas (Aimee makes superb Dalaran Brownies). I was hoping for some hints for a crash diet before twenty-four of my closest friends see me next week when we go to defeat Arthas. I promise it will be just between us elf girls. Well, in your case past elf.

Hugs and Kisses,
Sabely, Priestess of Elune and Brownies
<Detheroc>

Sylvanas responds:

All I'll say on the matter is that maintaining one's girlish figure becomes considerably easier when you can cut out certain items from your diet -- like food.

Although, if you're interested in losing some weight quickly -- very quickly -- I suppose I could get you in touch with my apothecary. He's got something that'll make the pounds just melt away.


So, Dark Lady,

I've noticed some Dark Rangers hanging out in Dalaran, and Loralen was with us in Icecrown... When do we get training to be this awesome?

-Huntardo

Sylvanas responds:

Until recently, the dark rangers had been a very elite group of raised high elf hunters, much like myself, but hunting and tracking are qualities that seem to come naturally to my forsaken. It's no surprise that some of the traits of the leader would be instilled into her subjects, and now that Arthas has finally been defeated, it's the perfect time to expand our horizons and offer rigorous ranger training for all forsaken.

Besides, it was either this or paladins, and what forsaken really wants to be a paladin? I hate to go all Lor'themar on this, but it was a matter of resources, and I think I made the right choice.

Right?


Beloved Dark Lady,

We are experiencing logistical difficulties with some of the Cult of the Damned prisoners we brought back from Northrend. We have asked each of them, "Undeath or cake?" So far, they have all chosen to join us in undeath.

This leads to our problem: we're running out of undeath! We simply weren't expecting such a rush. This leaves our prisoners with the choice of "Or cake?," which isn't a choice at all. Is there anything else we can offer these prisoners until more undeath arrives?

Sincerely,

Edward Gizzard
Royal Apothecary Society

Sylvanas responds:

We're an entire civilization based entirely around being raised, living in a city filled with plague slime, staffed by the finest apothecaries on Azeroth. I find it hard to believe that we could simply run out of undeath.

If that truly is the case, though, offer them the chicken.


Dear Sylvanas,

I first wanted to express the honor I felt while fighting by your side to retake the Undercity. It was an amazing experience. During the battle I noticed you began to sing as you volleyed down masses of enemies. It was hauntingly beautiful tune. The resulting buff allowed me to melt faces with ease. I was hoping that you could tell me the name of it and perhaps teach me to sing it as you did. Best wishes !

Anachronista
Undead Shadow Priestess
US - Sisters of Elune

Sylvanas responds:

Sure. It was "We Built This City" by Jefferson Starship.


Hey Sylvanas,

What kind of deoderant do you have piped into the undercity? Because when I was there helping to clean up your mess after the Wrathgate, it didnt all smell that bad. It was like lemon, wildflowers with just a hint of rotting decaying body parts. We dwarfs would like to know, as the gnome smell is becoming an issue in Ironforge.

Thank you for your time,

Dolar
Department of De-gnomification, Ironforge University

Sylvanas responds:

Even a cursory glance at most forsaken would inform you that most of us long ago lost our sense of smell, so the smell of the Undercity tends not to be too much of a concern. That said, though, we do get a lot of foot traffic from our allied races, and some of them (blood elves) act like their food has been topped with a bit too much Baby Spice, if you get my meaning, when they visit.

I told them that it was their problem, and they somehow got that Lor'themar to requisition the Undercity some ten thousand barrels of enchanted perfume from Silvermoon. True story: for blood elves, it's all in the perfume. Addiction does strange things to elven physiology, and if you think Orgrimmar smells bad, you should try a single building in Silvermoon sans perfume. I'm dead and I think it smells foul. And then they whine to me about a few corpses? Elves.



Dear Lady Sylvanas,

Please forgive this intrusion into your interview but I was asked by Chromie to deliver this message to remind her to travel back in time to two weeks ago to ensure that she answers the questions that were posed for her. If you do not want to see the fabric of space and time ripped apart (and I'm sure you don't...right?) I suggest you include this. If it makes you feel any better you can always answer something trivial, like 'what is your favorite colour?' in order to maintain the essence of this segment.

-Chromie's assistant

Sylvanas responds:

I'll ... uh. Purple. It's purple.



Hello, Lady Sylvanas.

Since you have experienced being a night elf and a undead which race of guys interest you more; Night elf or undead?

- Johnny Lightning, Undead peasent

Sylvanas responds:

What? I've never been a night elf. I have no idea what you're talking about.

*bounces idly*

That's all for our audience with Sylvanas! Next week, we'll be speaking with Master Mathias Shaw of Stormwind's SI:7. Simply email sacco@wow.com with the subject line "AAFL" with questions you'd like Mathias to answer -- anything from tips on assassination to questions about how to quell riots -- and it might just get a response.