Scientists, they've made our lives infinitely easier, healthier, and longer, but sometimes even their giant intellects can be stumped. Here we have a perfect example of such a scenario, where the seemingly innocuous question of what might happen if one were to dip a hand inside the Large Hadron Collider has generated a wide range of hypotheses, none of which sound particularly assured of being correct. The trouble is that, aside from the known unknowns -- such as whether the accelerated protons would crash and explode upon contact with your hand or just pass through -- there are surely unknown unknowns that will likely become apparent only once you try to do the act itself. So, any volunteers?