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The druid called Not Spot stood with his jaw ajar while he watched a cackling blood elf run away from the Alliance bonfire. "Did that man just relieve himself on our fire?" the druid asked. Throgg nodded slowly. "Desecrating the FIre," the orc said. "If it helps, the Alliance do it to our Hor...

1 year ago 0 Comments
June 28, 2013 at 7:00PM
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"It's not that I'm not happy to see you," Lolegolas carefully said. "But what on Azeroth are you wearing?" "You look like a stag beetle," Throgg said. "Like an angry, fuzzy stag beetle." The druid looked down at his outfit and then plucked the helmet off his head. "Oh. It's the Grievous Gladi...

1 year ago 0 Comments
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The dashing duo of destruction and daring-do sat calmly around a basic campfire. They were certainly not arguing about whether the campfire would be suitable replacement for Garrosh and they definitely weren't discussing the basic campfire's ignominious transformation into a simple cooking fire. Bu...

1 year ago 0 Comments
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It's Memorial Day weekend in the United States. And so we feature the Girdle of Eternal Memory. It's a silly, meaningless gesture in the face of the overwhelming sacrifices made by the members of our uniformed services, but it's the one we have. So this weekend, I hope you take a moment or three of...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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The ghostly creature hovered in the air, quietly chewing on a chocolate chip cookie. Her iridescent wings flapped in slow, lazy arcs. "And you don't know where you got her?" Lolegolas asked. "No clue at all?" "None," Throgg confirmed. "I just opened up my pet bag and poof. There she was. She'...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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"I have a plan," the druid told the curious wolvar pup. "I know how I'm going to get you adopted." The pup looked up at the Gilnean and growled curiously. "Skrrrrrrr." "There's this orc. Likes puppies," the Gilnean said. "And it turns out, you're a pup. He's going to call you Spot, though. I ...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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Throgg danced a merry jig, playing his flute, with a line of snakes following along behind him. Lolegolas leaned against a tree, watching the orc rock out with his flute out. The meadows surrounding them shimmered with yellow grass. "So, you really got into the rebellion, didn't you?" Lolegola...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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"Throgg. Throgg!" the blood elf yelled. "There's a miniature kaiju eating my shoe." Lolegolas watched the little monster gnaw on his boots. "Why is there a miniature kaiju eating my shoe?" Throgg smiled and shushed the little monster away from the elf's footwear. "It's Gazh'rooki!" "I... se...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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The druid known as Not Spot muttered to himself while scrawling a sigil on the ground. The artwork took longer than usual since he was using the handle of an immense hammer. As soon as the picture was finished, a flash of light erupted in the small clearing and a woman in scintillating robes appe...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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Lolegolas slapped a hand over his mouth to keep from laughing. Throgg failed to restrain the same urge but his mirth emerged as uncontrollable giggles. "What?" roared the Lil' Bad Wolf. "You dare mock me? Tremble before my mighty claws!" "You're just so cute!" Lolegolas responded. "Run a...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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The worgen ran on all fours. Thick padded feet pounded earth and stone and grass. He occasionally swapped out the canine gift of his nation for the more magnificent speed of a stag. But mostly, the worgen just ran. The Band of Finding glittered on his paw. Hand. Hoof. It's a druid, it changes,...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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Throgg sat on the ground, waiting patiently. A whistle dangled loosely from his fingers while the orc looked around the clearing. He sighed. "What are you doing?" Lolegolas asked. He looked briefly to the sky. "Have you noticed I say that a lot?" "I have," the orc answered. "I'm waiting for...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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Lolegolas couldn't tell if his orc friend was dancing... or being electrocuted. Whichever activity it was, Throgg was waving a huge, gray stone around in the air. "What are you doing?" Lolegolas asked. "Uh. Rocking?" Throgg answered. "Wasn't it obvious?" The blood elf pursed his lips. "T...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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The druid made his way down the long, dusty road. Clothed in his human form, he nonetheless sniffed the air as he plucked his way along, leaning occasionally on his Staff of the Hidden Master. "So, how'd ye get the staff, lad?" his dwarf companion asked. "I thought that was reserved for monks....

2 years ago 0 Comments
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Think of this Phat Loot Phriday as a love note. It's a love note to you, our readers. It's a love note about a lovebird. Don't you see this lovebird? Isn't it a thing of beauty? It's like you, our readers. A thing of beauty. We wanted to make sure you know about this swift lovebird, because yo...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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The man not named Spot stared at his bone. It was a good bone, from days gone by. He held it in his hands and heaved a huge sigh. Except for the thick glass of stout by his side, the man may have been holding back tears. "Hey, there, buddy," the bartender said. "Why the long face?" "This wa...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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"Throgg, we're supposed to be finding your dog." "Our dog." "Your dog," Lolegolas countered. "What are you doing in there? We're in a hurry." "It's an outhouse," Throgg replied from behind the wooden door. "It's the Throne of Thunder. What do you think I'm doing?" "Forging Deep Thunde...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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"Mr. Throgg!" the gnome cried out to the towering orc. "Will you play ball with us?" Throgg stood up slowly from the log bench. He felt exhausted. Not very tired. Not fatigued. He felt exhausted. Concentration and focus alone could move his muscles. But for a gnome like Sharni, who'd made him ...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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From the journal of Lolegolas: It's day 109. I feel the hours creeping longer as the rumbling pit in my stomach grows. We haven't eaten since we left Pandaria and even the sinew from my bow begins to smell tasty. If we don't eat soon, I will be forced to take a drastic measure. The d...

2 years ago 0 Comments
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The final installment of Alliance vs Horde - Mists of Pandaria is a surprisingly philosophy-laden episode. Filled with love, zen, and peaceful statements, it ends in exactly the way you imagine it will. This has been a fun series, and the final breakdown and punchline is totally worth the anti...

2 years ago 0 Comments