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The Road to Mordor: A conspiracy of hats
The hat, as they say, makes the man. Or the woman. Or the Dwarf. Unfortunately, in Lord of the Rings Online, the hat often makes the man completely silly. I'm not quite sure how it happened, but the hats in LotRO have garnered the reputation as being goofy as all get out. Sure, this is hardly a fresh observation, but I've wanted to address it in this column for a while now, so it might as well be today! Rumor has it that Turbine's artists drew upon actual medieval outfits to lend an authentic, renaissance faire vibe to the game. This is perhaps why there is such a distinct fashion style in LotRO that you don't see in other MMOs. Our modern sensibilities, with such fashion achievements as tank tops and crocs, make hauberks and codpieces seem quaint and ridiculous. Truly, we are seeing the height of human civilization in 2010. So while it's laudable that Turbine tried to give us the real deal, that doesn't quite excuse the fact that many of the hats -- especially the light armor versions -- are unbearably weird. It's as if, as The Pix'led Life speculated, there's a conspiracy of hats afoot: "Let's see what we can make them swallow!" one artist cackles. "Ooh, I know -- how about 16 varieties of dunce hats?" laughs another. I kid, I kid. There are 17. Hit the jump and let's take a terrifying journey through headgear that seeks to conquer Sauron by making the Enemy laugh himself to death.
Games that shouldn't be MMOs
Here's a corollary post to an earlier story. Our cousin site, Cinematical, has brought teh funneh with a post about which board games would make awful movies. In that spirit, we now present to you a list of games that would make terrible MMOs, in no particular order.Please note that these are merely our particular opinions, and we're not saying that a cleverer-than-thou developer couldn't make a great MMO out of these games ... but for reasons we'll state here, it's highly unlikely. Then again, sometimes the best-sounding ideas turn out some awful games themselves (*cough* Fury *cough*), so it all evens out. Excelsior!
