Cellphones: dangerous/ not dangerous , chapter 8034

So it's not like this ruling actually sheds any (god forbid) actual new information of the variety that might potentially be useful to people, but we sure as hell will all sleep better at night knowing we've thrown some more litigation at the ever-pressing question of how dangerous cellphone radiation is to the human body. A divided federal court of appeals in Baltimore yesterday reinstated a set of five class-action lawsuits against the cellphone industry, claiming it has failed to adequately protect consumers from unsafe levels of radiation. The lawsuits seek a simple end: to get phone manufacturers to provide free headsets with phones, as well as to collect punitive damages. The lawsuits had been dismissed last March on the grounds that federal wireless regulations trumped the state law claims, but yesterday the 4th Circuit Court of Appeals reversed the ruling in a 2-1 decision. In other words — we still don't know a damn thing about whether cellphones are dangerous or not, but thanks to this article we now know that the attorney representing the cellphone industry is none other than Kenneth Starr of Whitewater fame. And truly, isn't it a relief to let go of all this messy science and let the lawyers ferret out whether or not we're all at risk for cancer?

[Via textually.org]