See, when the Resident Evil for the Wii was announced as the Umbrella Chronicles, we thought, great! An overarching story about everyone's favorite zombie-producing conglomerate. And we're getting that (in a sense), but it turns out that we've been fooled ... here, "umbrella" means "that which covers all" and chronicles seems to stand for "a little rehash of a lot of story."
That's right, folks -- the so-exciting ReWii may not be that exciting after all. Instead of an all new game or a straight up remake, Umbrella Chronicles will feature four chapters that recover old ground from games 1-4, and some Wiimote functionality has been tossed in like a drizzle of chocolate atop a subpar sundae.
While it will no doubt be interesting to see the long and winding story of Umbrella told in this fashion, it still feels like a copout. Capcom is throwing us a bone so that we remain dedicated to their series. Where's our game? Where's our chance to blast all new zombie heads? If we get it, it won't be soon. For now, we'll cling to the old idea that good things come to those who wait. But if they make us wait too long, we may be storming Capcom ala the torchbearing villagers in RE4.
[Update: The teaser trailer has hit the net and is after the break.]