Friday Video: Ultimate secrets edition

This week, we here at DS Fanboy are going to offer you a special treat for our featured video. We're going to reveal a concrete way to realize your dreams of being an international wo/man of mystery, racking up hangers-on and piles of glittering jewels. Oh yes. It's all inside.

Awecat will look at you as though you are a giant slab of raw tuna rolled in catnip.

The One Who Got Away will call you and want your hot body. F'realz.

You will crush your enemies in Mario Kart DS this weekend and make them weep like little girls.

If you're ready for your close-up, hit the jump.

Nah, we're blatantly lying. It's just Gyakuten Saiban 4 with a new promo trailer. We're happy that some of you, at least, won't be disappointed that this turned out to be the Grail!