Japanese hardware sales, May. 7 - May 13: Office Space edition

Jason Wishnov
J. Wishnov|05.19.07

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Japanese hardware sales, May. 7 - May 13: Office Space edition
JHS Reports...worse than TPS Reports.
David: Hey, Jason, yeahhhh, I'm gonna need you to get on those JHS reports ... did you see the memo?

Jason: Uh, yeah, I saw it. Thanks, Dave.

David: Good, good. I'll let you get to it, then.

(Jason sighs, and begins to type frantically.)

Alisha
: Heyyyyy, Jason, did you see the mem--

Jason
: For the love of God, yes. I'm on it.

Alisha: No need to snap, Jason. Sounds like someone has a case of the Fridays.

(Jason mumbles as Alisha walks away. JC and Eric approach.)

JC: I can't believe it. I told those fudgepackers I liked JC's music. Me! I've never despised any form of sensory input as I do those songs.

Eric: Why don't you just change your name then?

JC: No way. Why should I change?

Eric: I think he's dead, man.

Jason (pausing from his work): Who are you talking about? I can't even think of any musical artists named JC ....

JC: You know. Christian rock?

Jason: Oh.

Eric: Hey, at least people can pronounce your name, Fletcher. I mean, what's so hard about Caoili? Cay-Oh-Lee. Caoili.

Jason: Hey, can you guys check the Airport connection on this Mac? It's like, broken or something.

JC: Apple loadletter? What the f*** does that mean?

Eric: That thing is lucky I'm not armed.

Jason: Didn't you buy a handgun last week?

Eric: Friggin'! You're right!

(Eric takes out a handgun and goes on a MacBook obliteration rampage.)

Jason: You know, screw these posts. I'm just not going to do them anymore.

JC: You mean you're going to quit?

Jason: No, I'm just ... not going to do them.

JC: Alisha's gonna get angry at you, you kno ... oh, crap, here she comes now.

Alisha: Jason, I think it's time we had that little talk--

(Jason punches Alisha in the face. She collapses to the ground, bits of flair landing around her.)

JC: Whoa.

(James approaches.)

James: Has anyone seen my stapler ...?

Jason: You write on a blog, James. You don't work with paper.

James: I could ... I could set it on fire...

Jason: What, the internet? Good luck with that one, buddy.

- DS Lite: 163,785 121,338 (42.56%)
- Wii: 52,544 48,776 (48.14%)
- PSP: 34,433 739 (2.10%)
- PS2: 10,414 4,401 (29.71%)
- PS3: 8,839 4,135 (31.87%)
- Xbox 360: 2,105 1,100 (34.32%)
- Game Boy Micro: 408 68 (20.00%)
- GBA SP: 343 41 (13.58%)
- Gamecube: 315 79 (20.05%)
- DS Phat: 39 30 (43.48%)
- GBA: 18 7 (63.64%)

[Source: Media Create]
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