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TUAW's Top X Things To Do if You Can't Attend WWDC '07

David Chartier

Developers and other Mac notables are descending once again on San Francisco for WWDC 2007. It is sure to be a week of exciting product announcements (not just from Apple, mind you), parties galore and elbow rubbing in a way only the Mac community can lay claim to.

But what if you can't go?

Fear not, oh devoted reader of ours, for we have a 10-step plan that is sure to shake the "can't get to WWDC" blues. Who cares if you can't join the keynote audience Monday morning in giving Steve Jobs a standing ovation just for walking on stage? And who needs to go to the Delicious Generation party! It's just going to be a bunch of drunk Mac notables standing on tables and singing Daisy Bell together. Besides, the t-shirts we're giving away at our TUAW meetup are gonna be way cooler, but if you can't attend that... why go to WWDC at all?

If you're stuck at home and unable to acquire your wife's credit card number, our list of suggestions is for you. Besides, these are gonna be, like, way funner than anything happening in San Francisco this week anyway:
  1. Take chalk, umbrella, sleeping bag, get an early start on that camp-out for June 29th
  2. Furiously refresh Engadget and MacRumors for live coverage of Jobs' keynote
  3. Seek out every developer's blog you've ever bought software from and ask them if you can share their room or just sleep on the floor if you buy a second license
  4. Ignore the live coverage and don't check your RSS feeds so you can have all the excitement of playing Keynote Bingo Monday afternoon with what will likely be a pixelated and barely-working QuickTime stream
  5. Collect apple cores, attach to puppeteering rigs, put on a show to convince family that this is what Steve meant by 'Core Animation'
  6. Get VMware running Linux inside Parallels running Vista on your Mac Pro; leave your body and watch your own head explode
  7. Try to come up with slightly weird pronunciations of 'Leopard' to memorialize Steve's rendition of OS X 10.2 as "Jag-wire"
  8. Console yourself with the knowledge that this year the Apple party is in San Francisco, so there's no chance you'd get to go to the Company Store anyway
  9. Buy an iPiggy Bank and start saving for Macworld '08, because #3 isn't a very good plan to begin with
  10. Phone your local Apple Store on the hour, every hour to ask "did you get [it] in yet?" Have a friend make the calls once the store recognizes your voice and/or blocks your number
And there you have it: 10 great ways to entertain yourself if - like many of us - you'll be watching the coming week's festivities from a distance.

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