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Burnout bugs begone! Paradise patched

Yeah, yeah, Burnout Paradise is the bees knees, the cat's pajamas, the, um, minimalist work of art. But that doesn't mean it's perfect, a fact that developer Criterion both admits and works to correct with a new patch that fixes many game-crashing and/or experience-altering bugs.

The problems fixed by the patch range from the urgent ("Some online race start points face the players in the wrong direction") to the goofy ("Surround sound fix - Centre speaker was 4dB louder") to the just plain weird ("Hammering the A (360) or X (PS3) after unlocking a car can cause the game to hang.") But only one listed bug truly made us sad: the one that caused "total time driven in player stats [to] stick at 145 hours." We can't help but feel sorry for those poor souls who spent over six whole days playing the game, only to have the game's statistics cruelly low-ball the amount of time they spent crashing virtual cars. Thankfully, because of this patch, their long national nightmare is over.