M1330 and M1730! As we suspected it would, Dell really, truly went ahead and added options for a Core 2 Duo T8300, T9300 and T9500 to its XPS M1530 in short order after a mysterious message popped up hinting at as much on Friday. The 2.4GHz, 2.5GHz and 2.6GHz chips come at an upgrade cost of $75, $200 and $475 (respectively) and can actually be ordered right now. No, celebrating wildly in your cubicle wouldn't be overreacting.
[Thanks to everyone who sent this in]