Constellations in a "Monogram Collection." Here's the catch, though: the phones can't be monogrammed with their owners' initials. Oh, no, that would be uncouth. Instead, the phones bear Vertu's own "V" logo emblazoned repeatedly across their rarified hides in some sort of process that takes several hours to complete. They'll be available come April 1 in Pewter, Green, Red, Sky Blue, and Cerise -- and unlike their launch date, their stratospheric price tags will sadly be no joke.