Bank builds Oculus app to fly you around your stocks and shares

Well hello there, I'm Augustus Q. Moneybags, inventor of the word "Funtrepreneur" and thrillionaire owner of Military Industrial Complex LLC. Now, I may be an internationally loved businessman, y'see, but that doesn't mean I'm too good at calculatin' those ol' numbers, y'see. Now, however, I don't have to, since I've been using this software from the nerds over at investment bank Fidelity that runs on those Oculus Rift doohickeys. Strap it onto your face and you're magically transported to a world of skyscrapers, each one representin' a stock in your portfolio, y'see.

The bigger and taller (and wider) your building is, the better, just like that SimCity game I bought futures in back in the ol' dot-com bubble days. Anyway, the idea is that you can walk around the city and if one of them buildings starts to shrink, you can call your broker and get him to kick the corresponding stock to the kerb. There's also some clever visual tricks, y'see, like the fact that it's daylight when the stock market is open and dark when it's closed, and the idea is to have bad weather on the horizon if someone ever discovers that pyramid scheme boondoggle I put in place back in the '30s. Still, it's only a prototype for now, but I can't wait to be able to fly around a city made of my own money - except for those times that I fly my private jet around Columbus, that city that I actually own.

Mr. Moneybags' views are entirely his own and do not reflect those of Engadget or AOL.