Who does this, who has the time? How did eBay seller Adam "kilamad" Malik manage the stunning feat of collecting some 21,000 rare, out of print, 4K, Blu-ray, HD-DVD, DVD, Laserdisc, VHS and Beta films? Is this really all from desperate sods hawking titles to the pawn shop he worked at for 25 years? Did Han shoot first?
Seriously, how much effort went into creating this collection? How long did it take to assemble all 91 Best Picture winners, 603 Criterion titles, and even 311 of the 400-some 3D DVDs from the early '00s that everybody ignored? Are the titles in alphabetical or chronological order? Do I get the shelves as well? Does he realize that Blockbuster video is already out of business and no longer needs his competition?
Logistically, how is this sale even supposed to work? If I drop a million dollars to buy this entire collection, is the guy just going to rent a flatbed to get everything to me at once or do I get a big box of videos every week for the rest of my life like a bizarro Publisher's Clearinghouse sweepstakes winner? Wouldn't it be easier if we just swapped houses? Also, how cool is it that he's offering free shipping?
And, even if I did buy them all, how would I be able to fully enjoy the collection? How many years would it take me to watch all of them in a row? Would the runtime outlive me like a pet Galapagos tortise?
But most importantly, does the collection include the Legend of Billie Jean?
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