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After Math: Liar, liar, pants on fire

THAT'S NOT MY SONIC HOW DARE YOU
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Ladies and gentlemen, I come to you this week a broken man. My childhood dream of seeing a speedy video game rodent hero break the fourth wall and go on a road trip with a middling white male actor I only sort of recognize has been shattered. Not because he doesn't do exactly that, but because of those teeth. Those human, human teeth.

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Researchers find Twitter is good for amplifying lies

Their rigorous survey included an intense examination of *waves vaguely at the entirety of the social media hellscape in which we all currently reside*

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Putin signs Russian internet isolation bill into law

Jokes aside, this development does not bode well for the people of Russia. A regression towards isolationism only hinders the world's efforts to combat global issues like climate change and addressing why people keep marrying the Jonas Brothers.

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Facebook and Instagram ban Alex Jones and other far-right extremists

This is fantastic news for Alex Jones. Namely because now, when he spends his weekends in public parks shouting conspiracy theories through a microphone, he'll have some company! I mean, aside from the squirrels who -- I think we all know -- secretly control the world's gold bullion markets.

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Ajit Pai admits FCC got broadband growth figures wrong

Let me just take a nice, long sip of coffee from my ludicrously oversized Reese's Pieces brand mug then sit down and read about what FCC chairman Ajit Pai has been up to.

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How augmented reality put five Madonnas on stage at once

In the land of the blind Madonnas, the One-Eyed Madonna is Queen. Which means that four of these Augmented Reality Madonnas are about to get their Game of Thrones on.

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Google manually reviewed a million suspected terrorist videos on YouTube

Don't worry folks, after reviewing the flagged videos, Youtube is proud to announce that only a mere 90,000 of them actually contained terrorist content.

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Julian Assange sentenced to 50 weeks in prison for skipping bail

On the plus side, this serves as sort of a prison-going-experience warm up for Assange. Given that he's facing rape charges in Sweden and whatever the DOJ can make stick here in the US, Julian is possibly facing a whole lot of time behind bars.

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