I used to love these thingsWe feel as though we've done you a great disservice. We've been forcing the sales numbers on you in the format we see fit, giving you no say in the matter. Is this not the era of user-generated content and massively open-ended game worlds? Our horrible linear approach to the matter is, quite frankly, embarrassing.

How to rectify our horrendous errors? Why, with a classic choose-your-own-edition post! Follow the links you so choose, giving way to an ending entirely your own (except not really). Such innovation is unheard of in the Japanese hardware sales circles, and we're proud to be the first to deliver! Enjoy!

(Or, if you'd like to cheat your way to the end, just check after the break.)

The Case of the Missing Hardware Sales Chart

You, a wide-eyed yet street-smart rookie on the force, have travelled to Japan in search of a mysterious killer. He's been sabotaging children's grades and decreasing productivity all across your homeland, and your chief has decided that it's gone too far. Armed with your Baretta 9 mm and a standard taser, you step foot into the legendary Akihabara district in Tokyo, Japan.

Asking around (in your rather broken, stilted Japanese), you learn that a shady figure has been seen on the corner of Sephiroth and Deku. As you approach the intersection, a shady figure with a loose trenchcoat notices your presence. He turns and tries to discreetly retreat, but as you begin to pursue, he breaks out into a dead sprint! You see a car nearby with its keys still in. What do you do?

If you decide to try to track down the villain by foot, click here.


If you decide to try and track down the villain in the car, click here.

- DS Lite: 201,378 72,757 (56.57%)
- Playstation 3: 32,662 9,437 (22.42%)
- PSP: 30,815 14,125 (84.63%)
- PS2: 26,263 11,195 (74.30%)
- Xbox 360: 7,007 2,957 (73.01%)
- GBA SP: 1,26465 (5.42%)
- Game Boy Micro: 1,235 198 (19.09%)
- Gamecube: 576 62 (12.06%)
- DS Phat: 212 30 (16.48%)
- GBA: 27 3 (10.00%)
- Xbox: 0 6 (100.00%)

[Source: Media Create]

But you cheaters don't get to know the end of the mystery! Nyah nyah nyah!

This article was originally published on Joystiq.