10. "I'm having an allergic reaction to my cold medicine, and I need a day to recover."
9. "My dog has at a bunch of chocolate last night and I need to be with him."
8. "I have lice."
7. "I need to take a personal day. You don't want to know."
6. "I have to go see my probation officer."
Continue on after the break for the final five.
5. "I think I'm a Cylon."
4. "I think you're a Cylon."
3. "My soul collapsed under the crushing weight of the oppressive capitalist machine. I'll be in tomorrow if I level, however today must play this damn game."
2. "An Elf is telling me to go kill boars. Gotta run."
1. "I'll give you my BlizzCon polar bear mount key if I can just have this day off of work!"
While I wish I could take credit for all these, I used some permutations on things I found thanks to Googling to the following sites: