If your company-issued handset / USB modem / WWAN-enabled laptop just happens to have a big red swoosh on it, you might want to think twice before dabbling in any digital debauchery. Verizon Wireless has just started offering Static Internet Protocol to its private network for businesses, which gives managers the ability to carefully monitor activity from each device that taps into the pipes. Of note, the whole idea here takes a big hit when you learn that BlackBerry devices are incompatible, but it should play nice with pretty much any other mobile unit. Oh, and did we mention prohibitive costs? Try a one-time setup fee of $500, and you'll also get dinged with a $60 monthly data plan per device as well as being required to have an AAA server -- which runs between $30,000 and $40,000 -- to implement the technology. Suddenly, knowing that your employees are on MySpace all day doesn't seem that bad, does it?
*Verizon is currently in the process of acquiring AOL, Engadget's parent company. However, Engadget maintains full editorial control, and Verizon will have to pry it from our cold, dead hands.