If you're a product recall specialist hoping for your relatives to bank it big on an
airline disaster-related life insurance claim, this post isn't for you. For everyone else who'd like a greater chance of walking away from a decidedly rough landing, here's your ticket. New airline safety regulations going into effect this fall require that all airline seats stay intact even under an impact of 16 times the force of gravity -- nearly double the old nine G requirement. As of now any aircraft model introduced after 1988 has the sturdier new seats, but starting October 27
all planes will. Additionally, a number of airlines are starting to have seats sporting airbags but, wouldn't you know it, they're largely found in first class. Ostensibly that's because the greater gaps between seats means in an impact your calm, blank face won't get restrained by the tray of the seat ahead, but you know the truth, don't you?
posted Jul 1st 2009 10:41AM
In the case of an Airplane crashing, I think you might need a bit more than an airbag.
You would be wrong. Debris flying around after a crash is what kills most people in survivable crashes. This is including other people's bodies and seats.
That said, I would think a car-style across the chest seat belt would be cheaper than 300 airbags.
I want my in car foam immobilizer al la Demolition Man. Before impact the entire cabin fills up with this foam crap.....anyone who doesn't have a breathing mask on though will have a really bad day.
Nothing is going to stop 30,000+ pounds of aluminum, wires, and human bodies falling from 1,000+ feet.
that's a lie jared. the ground will stop that hunk o burnin mess right quick. stop em dead.
Why not just turn the seats 180 degrees som that you travel facing backwards.
Which airlines exactly have airbags in their seats? Last time I checked, the weight of adding airbags to the seats does not warrant the costs associated with carrying that extra weight.
If you read the article, you would have clearly seen that this intended for "rough landing," and other incidents that aren't quite a full-on crash.
I think everyone is quite aware that an airbag isn't going to help you too much in a total crash.
I think that instead of airbags, airlines should be required to provide all passengers with a large breasted lady to sit facing them. This way, we have someone to talk to, someone to look at, and, in the event of an emergency landing, instead of smacking your face straight into an airbag, the breasts surround your head slowing it down and providing a space for your head to sink into a la the motorboat.
"As of now any aircraft model introduced after 1988 has the sturdier new seats"
Good thing the Northwest planes I usually fly on now at DC9-30''s. The FINAL dc9 to roll off the production line was in 1982. Crap.
Sucks to be you if you are on a model produced December 18th 1988
I won't fly on a DC-9, even if its cheaper carrier. Too old for my taste. Not like Airbus is doing much to instill confidence. Good thing tomorrow i'm on a Embraer
If it ain't Boeing, I ain't going. ;)
How about making the plane out of the black box!
Well that'd be fine if you have no desire to fly: those things are way too heavy. Plus, orange really isn't in right now.
Unless of course you were parodying some other uninformed person... in that case, carry on sir.
They won't do you a whole lot of good as you are plummet out of the sky at a zillion miles per hour into the ocean/ground.
I guess that was implied with the Ed Norton Fight Club Reference.
"Suddenly you become euphoric, docile.
You accept your fate.
It's all right here.
Emergency water landing, 600mph.
Blank faces. Calm as Hindu cows."
Again, read the article. It's about rough landings, not about full-on crashes. I don't think anyone in the industry seriously expects an airbag to help you in case of a crash.
All I can imagine this being used for is another way to protect the flyers jaw so they their bodies are identifiable from their dental records.
Its the same reason you are meant to brace on the seat in front of you, to protect the mouth area.
Investing in Parachutes is probably a better idea....Or a better snack than peanuts...
Everytime I fly we get pretzels because they say too many people were allergic to nuts.
Apparently my ex-girlfriends aren't the only ones that use that excuse.
*rimshot*
Fuck that. Life insurance pays off triple if you die on a business flight;)
You spouse should get quad bonus miles too.
Too late for Billy Mays >:-(
HI I'm Billie Mayes and this is the airplane helmet! Call now and we will double your order! That's right TWO airplane helmets for just 19.95! You and your partner can BOTH be safe from falling luggage!
billy mays died of heart disease.
How bout an airbag for the airplane itself geniuses
I want my ejection seat...what you say? That if they all eject at the same time we would be crashing into one another?
Who said anything about everyone else having an ejection seat? ;-) Maybe that is what should be in the next gen plane All seats have the ability to eject but you need to spend an extra $2000 for the upgraded feature, else the option is disabled....hey it works on software. :-P
Soo....is there going to be a $5 safety fee for these to be activated?
HOOORAY for safety !
Not sure it would help in the middle of the ocean.
Duh, all the deployed airbags will keep the plane afloat ¡
Seems to me there are really only 2 kinds of plane crashes...Total disasters where everyone is dead or the crash where the pilot has some sort of control and everyone escapes. It is pretty rare to have ones in between...(though it does happen)....
Does anyone else have concerns about loading the equivalent of 200 or so shotgun-shells worth of explosive on a single airliner if airbags were mandated?
Trust me, there is plenty of stuff on an airplane that can cause to harm people. Unless it's just the explosives factor that gets to you. At any time your plane could be carrying explosives, real explosives. Firearms and ammunition are loaded onto planes daily as well. Albeit, in the hold, but still there.
Why would you need explosives? With an airplane, you have time before a crash... so the airbags could inflate slowly compared to cars. Right?
can we at least deploy these for regular usage? Because that looks more comfortable than sleeping in a 'reclined' position
.
This is great. Now you can be fully conscious as your engulfed in flames, burning to a cinder following the crash.
.
.
Actually, smoke inhalation kills or at least incapacitates people on board a burning aircraft well before their bodies burn up. A slightly comforting thought for those who fear burning up while being aware of it.
Ejector Seats for everyone ;^)... Better still parachutes for the whole plane.
Why should there be a crash at all? Just add 10 or more of these:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ballistic_Recovery_Systems
I agree that would be a great solution. But considering it would be cost prohibitive (Way to much drag = LOTS more fuel = pain in the $$$) they won't even consider it. Too bad, I have always wanted to uses a parachute.
Speaking of airplanes, I recently flew on an older model Airbus. It didn't have any of the fancy shmansy screens with outside camera views and a selection of multimedia stuff that come with the newer models. As a result, there was no multimedia box beneath the seats and so you can stretch your legs fully underneath the seat in front. The seats were leather, too!
I say, give us back the comfort and I will gladly bring my own entertainment.
But this wouldn't save you from snakes...
Airbags won't do SHIT! Your neck gets snapped backwards by it and your face will be ripped off as your body drags it across the airbag when your body is making its way to your knees. Beside, why add the weight and costs of airbags when the "put your head between your legs and kiss your ass goodbye" method has been quite effetive at preventing death on survivable crashes?
...Life insurance pays off triple if you die on a business trip.
I may want to trigger it manually just to sleep better...
this is about as morbid of an engadget post i've seen. a fight club reference'll do that, i suppose.
God Damnit, America! Can't we, as a society, just accept the fact that there is a possibility of dying in almost any circumstance. Instead of spending money to help protect our shitty, structured, insulated and "cultured" lives, maybe we should be thinking more about just living life.
You don't get a second life......Also maybe we need somthing to protect so we can keep our lives "normal" or what ever normal is.
No!!! Children can't go outside - because perverts steal children left-n-right... Airplanes will be equipment with dumb "let's make people FEEL safe" devices... And cars will be equiped with front distance, side distance; and bazzilions of airbags... And no swimming - Sharks (have you watched discovery channel lately?)... And riding a motorcycle KILLS people - everybody has heard of someone who died on a motorcycle (THEREFORE DANGEROUS)...
Enjoy your life to the fullest!!! Why grow brains, if you can grow your ass in front of television!!!?
AMERICA BECAUSE!!! ME LIKE!!!
props for the fight club reference, droogs.