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Rumor Roundup: PrimeSense nonsense

This week was predictably light on rumors, and the rumors themselves were predictably light on facts.

PrimeSense tech seen powering gesture controls for future Apple television products (AppleInsider)

As soon as the PrimeSense buy was confirmed, you knew this had to be coming - speculative nonsense from some analyst who's all, "Hey, PrimeSense makes the Kinect. And that's hooked into televisions. So Apple must be building a TV!"

This analyst doesn't expect Apple to release a TV in 2014. Which is convenient, because by the time 2015 rolls around and Apple doesn't release a TV that year either, we'll have all forgotten about this guy's claims. But today we feast on pageviews, my brothers and sisters!

Rumor: Apple taps Quanta to build bigger iPad, iWatch in 2014 (AppleInsider)

"The latest rumors on Apple's future products were shared on Monday by DigiTimes" - BZZZT, wrong, next!

Not only does AppleInsider do its readers a disservice by passing on garbage from DigiTimes, it goes on to spike its credibility by not writing a single word about DigiTimes' notoriously poor track record. Not even a single "sometimes reliable" qualifier for old times' sake.

Do you guys seriously think we'll just forget about how godawful DigiTimes' accuracy is if you stop mentioning it?

Apple's Plans to Enhance Touch ID with Trackpad Capabilities and Display Integration Revealed (MacRumors)

Source: An actual Apple patent application. Claims: completely believable and not at all hyper-speculative. I'll put this one in the "plausible" rumor box - right after I clear out months worth of cobwebs.

The reason Apple bought PrimeSense may have nothing to do with an iTV (BGR)

Really? Do tell, BGR. Enlighten us what Apple's PrimeSense buy actually means. I'm sure you've sourced this story well and you'll - hahaha, it's getting harder all the time to keep a straight face when I write stuff like that.

Anyway, some analyst thinks Apple's going to use motion controls for Maps. Given all the complaining that's been taking place over Apple Maps since it launched, I can think of one gesture in particular the app will probably try its best to ignore.

Rumor: Retina iPad mini bottlenecks ease quickly, production already exceeding first-gen model (AppleInsider)

Another article sourced from DigiTimes, the cloaca of technology news. And another instance where AppleInsider doesn't bother to clarify that the "source" of this story has a success percentage only slightly better than the Soviet Union's multiple failed attempts to land probes on Mars.