Nintendo-Apple merger? Don't hold your breath. [update 1]

Repeat after me: Apple will not buy Nintendo; Nintendo will never be bought. If I'm wrong, I will let the entire Joystiq staff and our top 5 contributors punch me in the gut. There is an article from CNET that came out yesterday (bearing a striking similarity to an O'Reilly blog post from February) that has given Nintendo and Apple fanatics a heart attack, but that article has no basis of a fact and is pure excrement speculation. The article extrapolates from a rumored Apple games division that the company may buy Nintendo. Let's look at their points:

• Similar corporate philosophies / design styles: "the DS Lite looks practically looks like [Apple designer] Jonathan Ive built it." So do a countless number of iPod knockoffs, but we don't think Apple will be buying those companies anytime soon. Size aside, even Microsoft's Xbox 360 appears inspired by Apple's sleek design philosophies, but it'd be a cold day in Hell if those two companies ever joined forces.

• "Cisco was rumoured to be looking at a purchase of Nintendo earlier in the year:" That would be a good support, except that the Cisco-Nintendo rumor spawned from another CNET article and was merely speculation by the author, with no factual basis (GameSpot denounced this rumor long ago).

Now, let us take a look at why Nintendo would never sell.

• They makes a profit. Nintendo has been profitable practically every year since it moved into the video game industry over two decades ago. The Nintendo DS continues to sell at a phenomenal rate, and Nintendo has yet another hit on its hands with the New Super Mario Bros.

• They have a potential mega-seller on their hands. Every poll Joystiq has put up has placed the Nintendo Wii in the running for a comeback, and the mainstream audience has been given some positive news about it by way of outlets such as the New York Times. As Next Generation wrote, Nintendo is making some really smart moves in terms of marketing its new console.
  

• Nintendo does not want to sell. The last time a rumor like this surfaced was when Bill Gates commented on how he'd love to purchase Nintendo. At that point, the possibility of such a merger was laughed at by most analysts and Nintendo officials. And that was in 2004, before the DS took off and before the hype for the Wii.

Even the article mentions the chances are low, so why write it? This has blatant sensationalism written all over it, with little research to back up its claims -- a fanciful dream that has given false hope to many in the community. Don't be fooled, Joystiq readers: Nintendo is going be around, standing on its own two feet, for quite some time.

[update 1: took out keiretsu principle, as it is not applicable. Sorry it took so long to change.]