SpyParty. Though we sympathize, there's really only one antidote and that's to become one of those people yourself. The quickest way to do that is by paying for beta access, and Hecker solidified exactly how much that'll run you today.
As we learned in May, the base rate for early entry will be $15, which includes the full game when it launches on PC and -- down the road -- Mac (free console copies likely won't happen). But, and this is the new bit, if that fee just doesn't seem like enough, you can give $50 or more and have your name included in the game's credits. Hecker stresses that beta access will be just that, with no other in-game perks, badges, awards etc. for early birds.
Apparently, Hecker wasn't listening after all those early SpyParty sessions when we offered him "Anything! Anything! Take it all! Just one more game!" with tears streaming down our faces and wallets upturned. Probably for the best.