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Zero Punctuation affected by Mass Effect's verbiage
Yahtzee delves into the interstellar drama of Mass Effect this week and walks away with the same issues as many others, but explains it in a way that only the British expatriate can. We already know Yahtzee doesn't like America very much, so we'll take it as a back-handed compliment that he doesn't mind listening to all the North American accents in Mass Effect as compared to Wookies grunt groan bellowing (what do Wookies do?) through Knights of the Old Republic. As his issue with Mass Effect lies in its wealth of dialog and text, we'll just end this post now.Find this week's NSFW dose of Zero Punctuation after the break.
Pachter insists Mass Effect coming to PS3
Wedbush Morgan analyst Michael Pachter is all but certain the Mass Effect trilogy is going multiplatform. In the latest episode of GameTrailers' Bonus Round (start about three-fourths of the way into the video), Pachter notes that, given the financial expectations Electronic Arts has with its recently-acquired developer, Mass Effect 2 "has to, has to" come to the PlayStation 3 in addition to the Xbox 360.More interesting is what Pachter says after his ME2 assertion. "I wouldn't be shocked if Mass Effect One came to the PS3," he said. We aren't sure the exact details of EA's acquisition, but we do know the original Mass Effect was published by Microsoft Games Studio, leading us to assume it was a safely exclusive title. Could EA port and publish the game on Sony's console? We doubt Microsoft would be willing to let that platinum-selling title go without a fight.
Mass Effect amasses a million in sales
Never let it be said that lesbian sex scenes don't sell video games -- and epic space opera plots don't hurt either. Wysteria Lane's street-hardened Microsoft executive Jeff Bell reveals to GameDaily that Mass Effect has affected one million in global sales over the three weeks since launch. In the same breath Bell also said that Halo 3 has reached the five million sales mark. There's still no word if the rest of the Mass Effect franchise will still be Microsoft exclusive, but with sales this strong we're pretty sure MS is going to try and keep Mass Effect all to itself. We'll see if some exclusivity money changes hands -- and if Sony decides not to partake in the process.
Something Awful pokes fun at Mass Effect
We've recently finished our first play-through Bioware's gargantuan space opera, and while we walked away from the experience with great satisfaction, we humbly suggest they change the title of the game from Mass Effect to "The Galactic Adventures of Chatty Cathy." Seriously, you'll exchange more words with your enemies than you will bullets. It's like a 12 Angry Men simulator, only in space, and sans Tony Danza.One of the goons at Something Awful recently made a parody of the lengthy conversation system in Mass Effect. Don't judge the comic by it's corny title (Ass Effect? Really?), as it actually has a few nuggets of comedy gold. However, if you haven't played the game yet, you might not get some of the jokes -- in which case, we present an alternate comic: Marmaduke!He's a dog who thinks he's a person!
Joystiq Podcast 026 - Space fondling edition
With news slowed to a slight trickle and good games coming in a torrent, we're forced to veer from the typical format to talk about the games we've been playing. If you're looking for the secret, inside scoop on Mass Effect, Assassin's Creed, Rock Band, Kane and Lynch: Dead Men or a bevy of other titles, we've got it. Also, space lesbians, a Brush With Fame and blood balloons. It's a bargain at any price. Get the podcast: [iTunes] Subscribe to the Joystiq Podcast directly in iTunes (MP3) [RSS] Add the Joystiq Podcast feed to your RSS aggregator [Digg] Like the show? Digg it. [MP3] Download the MP3 directly Hosts: Chris Grant, Ludwig Kietzmann and Justin McElroy Music: "Get Ready for Love" by Nick Cave, "Red Eye" by Ben Kweller. See all of this week's links after the jump.
Jeff Bell recognizes Joystiq's contribution to society
So, check this out, blogger's prerogative: We've totally flipped on Jeff Bell. Sure, when we first met Jeff Bell at E3, we rushed to judgment, laughing up our sleeves and revoking his Ghetto Pass. But as things went on, our understanding and appreciation of Jeff Bell (or, as he's known on the streets, "Jeff Bell") continued to grow.First, he goes all troll on the message boards, asking a user what his contribution to society was, which was undeniably funny. Now, he's starring in the above Mass Effect take-off straight from Microsoft HQ. Bell's performance in the clip, a clear indication that he's got a good sense of humor, would have been enough to win us over. But it certainly doesn't hurt that his monitor is clearly displaying everyone's favorite video game blog. Your check's in the mail Jeff Bell. That's right, the rumors are true: Microsoft is on Joystiq's payroll.
Metareview: Mass Effect (Xbox 360)
Sure, some of you lucky bastards readers already plopped a whole heap of time into Mass Effect thanks to K-Mart's inability to, you know, read. Others of us, however, don't get to play "Jack Bauer in Space" until tomorrow. Yeah, that's right, we're jealous individuals (sans those on staff who took advantage of the "blue light special") who know that Bioware determines its release schedule with a formula more complex than how the NFL calculates a QB's passer rating.We here at Joystiq are all primed and ready to save the universe, use our Force special powers on enemy combatants, knock boots with some genderless aliens, and finally move past Jade Empire. However, maybe you're not convinced as we are -- that's okay because the Metareview is here to help. GameSpy (100/100): "Mass Effect's greatest strength is the quality of the narrative. BioWare has a track record of producing amazingly engrossing storylines, but never before have you been presented with this level of meaningful interaction. You'll experience difficult and thought-provoking situations, including moral and ethical questions without a clear right or wrong answer. The Commander Shepard character is thus defined by player involvement, sublimely capturing the essence of role-playing." IGN (94/100): "Mass Effect is game that is greater than the sum of its parts. Technical issues abound, but the majority of Mass Effect is so expertly delivered that it can transcend its weaknesses. Applying number ratings to a game like this doesn't do it justice because there is no way you can ignore its technical flaws. Simply put, Mass Effect is a game that must be played. Then it must be played again. Don't pass this one up." Eurogamer (80/100): "Forced to stumble towards a conclusion, I'd say that despite the niggles, Mass Effect is most definitely a great game with an awful lot going for it - but one that doesn't quite deserve unquestioning praise. For what it achieves in delivering a compelling narrative and wonderful atmosphere, BioWare deserves a huge amount of credit, as there are few games that come anywhere near it in this regard. The dialogue system, and the impact it has on individual missions and the game as a whole is exceptional, adding greatly to the potential replay value. Where it doesn't quite hit the mark for me is in the action stakes. Although it underpins the game with all sorts of excellent ideas that ought to make it a deeper, more intelligent and immersive experience, the simple truth is that the minute-to-minute combat simply isn't as intense and involving as you'd expect from a game in 2007. Throw in some grumbles about the somewhat unoptimised state of the frame-rate, texture pop-in and v-syncing terrors, and it's a game that just falls short of our expectations. An eight, then, but a good one..."
Mass Effect soundtrack due November 20
While most Xbox 360 owners prepare to trek down to their favorite store or wait no-so patiently by the mailbox tomorrow for their chance to play BioWare's latest opus Mass Effect, Sumthing Else Music Works has announced that players can also pick up the game's official soundtrack on November 20, perfect for those times spent plotting against Saren while away from the console.The soundtrack was put together by veteran game music composers Jack Wall (Myst, Jade Empire) and Sam Hulick (Maximo vs. Army of Zin), with additional tracks by Richard Jacques (The Club) and film and television composer David Kates (Battlestar Galactica, Man of the Year). More interesting than the name dropping, however, is that soundtrack's blend of " 80's electronic music with modern orchestral scoring" apparently takes inspiration from some of our favorite films, such as Blade Runner and Dune, all but guaranteeing a trip to the cash register. What can we say? We're weak.
New games this week: Cornucopia edition
We know, we know. It's an easy way out. But with all of the releases this week, we just couldn't put one over the other. So, in honor of Thanksgiving, it's the cornucopia, with a little something for fans of first-person shooters, action, sci-fi RPGs and rocking totally out. But this week is about more than just Unreal Tournament III, Mass Effect, Rock Band and Uncharted: Drake's Fortune. Check out the full list after the break.
Sci vs. Fi: Mass Effect airing Tuesday
For those who didn't catch the Halo 3 edition of Sci vs. Fi (on, you guessed it, the Sci Fi network), you missed an interesting look at the game from a number of different perspectives. Scientists picked apart the game from a logistical standpoint, Bungie discussed the creation of the game, gamers talked about how the game differed from it's previous iterations, and Brian Posehn brought the funny. A good time was had by all.Tuesday night, Sci Fi is airing a special look at Mass Effect on the program. From the looks of it, we can expect the commentary of Keith David (Requiem for a Dream creepster who voices Captain Anderson in the game) and the ever insightful observations of the Cho-Bot. Of course, by that time, you'll probably have the game in your hot little hands, your mind aflutter with all the galactic exploration you'll soon be doing. We won't blame you if you forget to set your TiVos.
Singapore un-bans Mass Effect
The Singapore Media Developmental Authority has reversed its decision to ban Mass Effect from the country. The game will go on sale next week and have an M18 rating. According to The Strait Times, the Board of Film Censors will selectively use game ratings on high-profile games until January, when they expect to initiate a game classification system.The decision to ban the game earlier this week spurred from a lesbian love scene found in BioWare's anticipated RPG. The Strait Times also noted that Assassin's Creed was released this week with a rating for graphic violence.
Mass Effect banned in Singapore over lesbian scene
If a human female and a humanoid alien who is classified as female want to express their love in a physical manner, who are we to interrupt the natural order of the universe? According to Singapore newspaper The Straits Times, the government's Media Development Authority has banned BioWare's Mass Effect from sale in the country.As reported by Reuters, Singapore Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong said, "the city-state should keep its conservative values and not allow special rights for homosexuals." The lesbian scene was posted on GameVideos earlier this week before Microsoft asked them to remove it. [Thanks, Mitchell]
Mass Effect love scene now less safe for work [update]
Update: Microsoft has asked GameVideos to yank the video. Peepshow's over, folks!WARNING: Unlike the sex scene we linked last week, this one can be described as "not safe for work," "not work safe," "NSFW," "NWS," and "not safe to play around female spouse." Any potential job loss, spouse loss, or sleeping on the couch that you incur from watching this video lies solely on your shoulders. That said, there isn't any Asari nipple to be seen in the video, so this is an FX level skin drama at best. Said video, containing some (female) Commander Shepherd on Asari action beneath the break. Yeah, we tease like that.
Mass Effect launch trailer elevates excitement to critical mass
For those not lucky enough to snag an early, blue light special copy of Mass Effect, we humbly offer you this incredible launch trailer to slake your thirst. The short video does a great job of showcasing the game's ambitious cinematic qualities - we just hope it doesn't collapse under the weight of its own hype. Remember, you're just nine short days away from getting some strange tail in space.
Kmart reportedly breaks Mass Effect street date
It's official - 2007 will henceforth be known as the "Year of Broken Street Dates." First, BioShock was sold a week in advance by Toys R' Us, then there were the reports of number of early sales of Halo 3 throughout Europe, then the recent Rock Band mix-up at Best Buy, and to top it all off, a number of lucky gamers have apparently gotten their hot little hands on copies of Mass Effect from Kmart - a full ten days before the game's official release date.As with every instance of broken street dates, there's no guarantee that your local Kmart will be selling the game early, or that they will have any in stock. But if you're as anxious as we are to board the SSV Normandy to explore the Milky Way (while making some sweet, sweet, FCC-approved love), then you'll make the trip to your local Kmart, braving the Saturday shopping crowd, and sightings of terrifying anthropomorphic light bulbs.[Thanks, Alex]
Mass Effect ad talks choice, we choose Oprah
Across the country video game marketing departments are screaming, "Cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war!" Ads will begin to flood the airwaves and above we have the Mass Effect television spot. It's worth pointing out that in almost every instance -- other than the released lesbian sex scene (SFW) -- Shepard is portrayed as a scruffy mocha-skinned man. We don't know if the character selection screen is still the same as it was many moons ago, but we're praying to make a short chubby mid-life black woman to save the galaxy -- like Oprah. There's something satisfying about the star of a space opera not being a run-of-the-mill action hero guy. Help "Oprah" Shepard on her quest in Mass Effect beginning Nov. 20.
Mass Effect sex scene is SFW
"Close your eyes and relax, Commander," utters the blue-skinned humanoid as she brushes her fingertips against Ms. Shepard's cheek. Of course, your eyes are wide open as you hunch down in your chair and angle the monitor away from your coworker's potential gaze, curious to see how this issue of 'lesbian alien sex' plays out in BioWare's Mass Effect. Don't worry, you won't be spilling any hot coffee over this tastefully "steamy" scene.
LucasArts, BioWare collaborating on...something
With the dust only just now beginning to settle from Mass Effect developer BioWare's acquisition by industry powerhouse Electronic Arts, many of us believed that it would be some time before we got wind of the company's next project. It would seem, however, that we were wrong, as both BioWare and LucasArts issued a joint statement today announcing that the studios are working together on "an interactive entertainment product," stopping just shy of cluing us in on just what it is exactly that they are building behind the curtain.The two bedfellows, which have previously worked together on KOTOR, revealed next to nothing about the new project, stating only that it will "deliver an experience that will span the traditional boundaries of video game entertainment." So, is this project the oft-rumored Knights of the Old Republic MMO, or something else entirely? The wheels of speculation are turning.
Mass Effect is done and you still can't play it
Do you have a sense of rightness, of glee seeping into your nervous system? It's not your imagination. That's the sixth gamer sense letting you know that somewhere in the world BioWare's next RPG Mass Effect is complete. ... Or you're a crystal meth fiend. It's tough to say. But since you're reading Joystiq and not CheapDiscreetPseudoephedrine.com, we're going to assume it's the first one.But you're probably also discovering that you're feeling a little empty inside. That's because you know that, despite its incontrovertible done-ness, you still can't play Mass Effect until its release a month from now. ... That, or your having a post-meth-high crash. It's one of the two.[Thanks, EvanB]
Seth Green heads up Mass Effect cast
Attention nerds: Do not think for a moment that casting of Seth Green in a prominent role in Mass Effect is in any way a cynical ploy for geek cred or your attention. Yes, Green may have appeared in Robot Chicken, Idle Hands, Family Guy, Batman Beyond, Buffy: The Vampire Slayer and Angel ... hmm. OK, so maybe it's a little bit of a ploy. But Green's also a fine comedic actor, so it's not like he was only cast because it's a statistical certainty that his wallet holds at least one dollar that formerly belonged to you.Green is playing the sarcastic pilot role of Joker in the sci-fi RPG (not The Joker, sorry fanfic kids), but he's not sure he'll be playing the game. "I'm really bad with video games," he said. "Like I honestly just have no skill. And it's sad. I would love to play, but for some reason my hand-eye coordination doesn't work well these types of games." So ... does this mean no quick-time events in Play the Industry?
