warcraft-advice
Latest
Drama Mamas: What happens when we don't see eye-to-eye?
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. Creative collaboration is a fine art -- just ask this week's featured players on our 15 Minutes of Fame column, married co-authors Clay and Susan Griffith. You can frame a lot of the background stuff that goes into successful teamwork, but suffice it to say that when it works, it just works. This week, we take a letter from a reader who wants to know how the Drama Mamas pull off downing the drama without creating their own tug-of-war behind the scenes. Greetings, Ms Torres! You and Lisa Poisso collaborate on the WoWinsider column Drama Mamas. (Yes, I really don't have to TELL you that, but it helps in framing my question...) I am wondering, what kind of process to you two use for coordinating your column. I'm guessing that the two of you don't want to come out with essentially the same comments as the other, or you'd not have two separate takes. But on the other hand, I guess that you wouldn't necessarily want to be in each other's pockets before you got your own thoughts down, lest you succumb to group-think. So... in preparing a column, do you two ... what, exchange your respective column segments for the other's review? Talk the letter over before - or after - writing a first draft of your respective segment? Peer over the other's shoulder at the screen and snicker at misspellings? Who chooses the letter-of-the-week? And have either of you wanted to throttle the other over some issue raised by a reader letter? (Even a little?) Melvin
Drama Mamas: Much ado about funsuckers
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. I will be insinuating something later, hence this week's video choice. Hi there! I'm writing to you as a non-hardcore player, but one who's been playing since WoW started. Heck, I even played the Diablos on Battle.net! As a long term player, I can't help but notice the venom increasing from other players to the more casual or new. You go into a battleground only to hear the newbies being yelled at for not having PvP gear, or into a random instance to hear the same about raid gear. I've been married for going on 7 years and it was only a year and a half ago I got my husband to play with me. He certainly took to it like a duck to water, but the abuse from player to player made him so angry he eventually quit playing around the time Cata hit (he never had to deal with much abuse hurled at him as he geared up and learned to play quickly).
Drama Mamas: Are guild perks worth putting up with a bad guild leader?
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. We've edited the following letter for language and length, but I think we've successfully preserved the passion and relevant details. Several days ago our guild pretty much fell apart. Our guild leader, as far as we could tell, had been getting into an online relationship with one of our guildies, which by itself was bad enough. Online relationships don't often lead to good results, and this one was near-scandalous; our leader was easily in his 40s and the girl in question always dodged any question regarding her age; but we've heard her speak, and we suspect she was probably underage. Back to the issue. He was starting to drift away from the guild more and more over the past few months. He never responded to anyone's inquiries, procrastinated from actually addressing any problems that cropped up, and never gave anyone officership, even from active members such as myself who wanted to help contribute more to the guild. Near the end, many of our regulars had quit he game due to his lackluster leadership (some of which were his personal friends) and the entire guild was being run by the only two officers he had left.
Drama Mamas: What to do after inappropriate chat between wife and guildie
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. Marriage is hard -- really, really hard. It's full of compromise and sacrifice. Sharing WoW as a common hobby can be a real boon to a healthy marriage, but it can also be a hotbed of temptation for an unhealthy one. Dear Robin and Lisa, I find myself in a situation that I have largely brought upon on myself. What I come to you for help in is what to do after I bust my butt fixing things. My wife and I both play WoW and lately I haven't been playing as much as I used to. Well along those same lines, I've been a bit blinded by my own happiness and blissfully living in ignorance of how the rest of my life outside of the game was going as far as the happiness of my wife. As of recently I have come to find out that she isn't as happy as I thought and that she has been sending text messages back and forth with a guildmate, that borders on the wrong side.
Drama Mamas: Sexist jerk or personality conflict?
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. Lisa and I had different reactions to this week's letter, which is always more fun than when we agree -- don't you think? Dear Mamas, My husband and I hopped servers in November and joined a new raiding guild. We were really unhappy with our old server and have found the new one quite wonderful. We thoroughly enjoy our new guild and have been with them for a number of months. We progress with a light raid schedule, doing heroics and keeping a 25 man raiding guild alive. Unfortunately there is one member who has made things quite inhospitable. I'll refer to him as X. X came in on a server transfer, someone the officers and long standing guild members had known and played with for a while. Coming in I thought he was a great player, did everything his class was supposed to do. Then he spoke. And wrote. And trolled our forums. And the more he spoke the more he got under my skin. Mainly the constant bashing of women in general, but also of the women in our guild.
Drama Mamas: Raiding deaf
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. Imagine there are no funsuckers. It's easy, if you ... turn off trade chat and don't guild with the ex-guildies of this week's letter writer. I started playing WoW right after BC came out. For the most part I was a solo player, so my own problems never really reared their head. It wasn't until my first guild that I ran into problems. You see, I'm deaf. I wasn't born this way, but I lost my hearing in high school as part of a degenerative disease I have. It wasn't until a few years ago that I managed to get cochlear implants to restore my hearing, but they're not what I would call perfect. My implants do work, allowing me to hear for the most part, but that's not without problems. Some tones or particular nuances of sound are still lost; and it's physically impossible for me to use headphones, since I don't hear with my ears anymore, but this odd little disc stuck to my head near the back of my ear. Due to how it works, the headphones simply no longer work; or if they do, it produces a massive feedback loop in my head which hurts to no end.
Drama Mamas: Liar, liar
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. World of Warcraft has been out so long now that many kids have grown up playing it. Their behavior, world views, opinions, and so forth have changed drastically as they grew from ages 13 to 19. This should not be surprising, as we all were vastly different after six years in childhood. I think it's hard to remember this when you're an adult, when six years normally means some change but not necessarily extreme change in everything about ourselves. Decisions we made at 15, both in game and out, are going to be different from decisions we make after graduating from high school and everything that goes along with that event. This is something I tried to keep in mind when answering this week's letter.
Drama Mamas: Vent troubles vs. That Guy
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. The above video is not on topic. Anyway, let's talk about That Guy. He's always causing drama. Or is he? Dear Robin and Lisa, I recently found myself in an interesting situation: Running our guild second 10 man raid team. Or more accurately, finishing it off with two tanks, a healer and a DPS. Getting the DPS and the healer was fairly easy without going outside the guild or recruiting anyone. And I even convinced one of our officers to be the MT. This afternoon, at the spur of the moment, he (the MT guild officer) formed a Bastion of Twilight raid with most of the second team members in it, including me (shammy healer), along with a tank friend of his. So, we get there, join vent, mine is working fine (this is important) and we start the first pulls, things are going just fine and we get to the first boss. Halfus has 3 drakes available (twilight, slate and time) so after a short discussion in vent, a strategy is decided on and we attack the boss. Three wipes later, they down the boss, my first ever kill on Halfus. I even get this amulet drop which is a huge upgrade for me, so I am happy.
Drama Mamas: Is WoW cool? Should you care?
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. Drama Mama Lisa got a letter from a fan, and we've stolen it for this week's drama. Hi Lisa My name is Joe. I'm a 15 year old student from the UK. I've been a reading of your blog for a long time now and have been enjoying it for just as long. I'm writing to you today with a WoW related issue that I need advice on and I've come to you as not only do I want a experienced professional but also long-period, friendly WoW gamer. I played World of Warcraft for around 2 years, then I quit but got back into it. Last December I quit my subscription again and haven't played since. I have only recently began reading Wowinsider again and have been engrossed with the posts for 2 weeks. Now, I'm also watching cinematic videos, gameplay videos and anything recently on Wowinsider. This has confused me about whether or not to re-join the World of Warcraft community. I really need some advice.
Drama Mamas: How many chances should misbehaving guild members get?
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. We talked about transgender bullying before, but there is no bullying going on here. Is there coddling? You be the judge. Hi Robin, Lisa Roughly three years ago, a "girl" joined our guild. She was under our 18+ limit, but we forgot to ask at the time of recruitment so afterwards, we told her to remain in the guild she would have to show mature behaviour. She's now 19. Over the years, she has had her ups and downs. She acts out. She acts up. She smartens up. The cycle repeats. She has been warned her behaviour would have consequences. She has been demoted, promoted, demoted again. I rarely become close to people in the game simply because I don't want to be attached on a certain level, but she reminds me so much of me when I was her age. Insecure, bullied, and very alone. The Internet, for me, brought me out of my shell and gave me the bravery to face the real world. I just worry she uses it as a crutch. I have encouraged her to move on from the Internet and do things in the Real World. Since then, she has improved in school dramatically and gotten a job.
Drama Mamas: The combustible combination of minors and romance
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. This week, we tackle a topic that I find rather scary, as a mother of a budding drama queen and gaming geek. Hi, This may be way beyond the kind of thing you can help with but my guild has recently suffered a few bits of drama that have revealed a worrying situation and I'm having a hard time working out what to do next. About a month ago a young girl (mid teens) joined the guild, we don't have a specific age range although as a casual end game guild we expect a certain level of maturity. She didn't interact much with the guild although one guy who helped her out a bit she really latched onto. She wouldn't run heroics unless he was there and they often moved into different vent channels to be alone. After a couple of weeks we had to kick her from the guild as she simply couldn't take criticism. It also turned out that she had recently been pulled out of school due to depression although some of the higher level officers in the guild were speculating on if that was genuine or was an excuse.
Drama Mamas: The case of the underage scammer
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. It's always more interesting when Lisa and I disagree. This week is very interesting. Let's get right to it. So... Here's my story. The first part is probably pretty typical, but it's what I did in response that I'm conflicted about. I feel I could use the advice of someone who understands WoW. I saw somebody advertising in trade that he was selling the ruby shades for 500g. I'm not sure why I thought even for a second that it might be real; even on a low-pop server, that's two orders of magnitude low. But I did, so I arranged to meet with the "seller". He expressed some hesitation about the 500g price and we negotiated a higher price - none of which turned out to matter, since it quickly became clear that he did not have the shades at all. At one point he put an item with the same icon as the shades (yes, I have seen the real ones) into the trade box.
Drama Mamas: When guild officers break up
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. If you have sent a letter recently to dramamamas@wowinsider.com, we didn't get it. Please resend to robin@wowinsider.com, and use that email until we get the official Drama Mamas email sorted out. We're sorry for the inconvenience. Meanwhile, love is still in the air -- in Azeroth, anyway, and today we have another love-themed letter. Last week we talked about getting together, and this week we talk about breaking up. Dear Dramamamas. I am writing you, as I am in deep disarray. I recently broke up with my girlfriend, after a 2year long relationship. I know that is not much for many people, but for me it is. The relationship were kind of doomed from the start, as I was an army officer with hunger for adventure, and her a beauty with hunger for a settled life. When we met, we quickly found a common ground; World of Warcraft. We started playing together, and after a few failed attempts trying to find the perfect guild, we finally found this pristine little gem.
Drama Mamas: Love is all around
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. I know that Love is in the Air, but I like the song Love is All Around so much better. Of course, my favorite version (or perversion) is Billy Mack's, but 'tis no longer the season. Love is certainly all around us right now, what with hearts and cupids being displayed all over the physical world as well as WoW. Mix it with all of the Lunar Festival lanterns in game, and you've got one gaudy Azeroth. However, romance isn't just about decorations, fragrances and boxes of chocolates. It's also about couples getting to know each other and exploring relationships beyond friendship. Hi. About two months ago I met a woman on WoW that I play the game with quite often now, and I'm very interested in her romantically. How should I approach this? I have spoken with her and flirted with her quite a bit, but I dunno if dating her would ruin what we have on WoW, or if it's really a good idea to do this. I've never dated anyone I've met on a video game before. I'm mostly a casual gamer, but I have played WoW for about 6 years now, on and off. Note: I have talked with her via social networks as well, and I have seen what she looks like. I am currently 26 years old. If you have any insight, please and thank you, I appreciate your time and effort. Romeo
Drama Mamas: Proper AH etiquette when a guildie helps craft
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. So. Dreamy. I perhaps should have warned you that if you are going to send letters that contain even the slightest hint of a Jane Austen reference, this kind of thing would happen. Well, now you know. Hi, I recently had an issue with a guildie that I would like to ask about. At the beginning of the expansion, it was a goal of mine to get one of the Darkmoon Card trinkets crafted. As we all know, it is no small task. A fellow guildie (and fellow officer) offered to help me with the task. So I immediately flicked the farm herb switch, and set out to make it happen. After a couple of weeks, more research into available trinkets, and nearly 60 stacks of herbs, I was one card away from the deck. I was able to purchase the last card for a good sum of gold and finally had my deck ready for the Darkmoon Faire. With all of the gear research I had done, I concluded that the trinket I had worked so hard for was going to be replaced very quickly. So I decided that I'd try to sell it, reasoning that there were other personal goals I had in the game that could benefit from a chunk of gold. After posting it on the AH and being away for a day, my guildie that crafted it for me shot me a fairly aggressive tell saying how he thought selling it was a low thing to do. He explained that he even used some of his own herbs to craft the cards and that the only reason he offered to begin with was to help a guildie get raid-ready. I took it off the AH so as not to cause problems and explained that I wasn't aware he had to use his own mats to help make it all. I found out later that he had been ripping me to others about selling it before he spoke with me. I posted an explanation in our forums of why I was going to sell it at all. apologized if I offended anyone, and stated that I would be using it after all.
Drama Mamas: Letter-writers tell what happened next
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. Now that's drama. That part when Onyxia lays the smack down? Squee! Anyway, here it is: the long-delayed (by me), greatly anticipated (also by me) results edition of Drama Mamas. Woohoo! We took the responses we've received from those we've given advice to over the recent months and compiled them here, with links to the appropriate columns. There are other results from our advice that we know of but don't have permission to discuss in public here. For example, sometimes letter-writers will post in the comments with explanations, but they've chosen not to identify themselves -- so we're not outing them here. But that doesn't mean we're hurting for responses. Join us after the break for results from some of the most controversial letters we've posted.
Drama Mamas: The case of the gold-selling guildie
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. I received the gift of massive drama for the holidays, which is why we went on an unscheduled hiatus. But that hiatus ends now. The promised roundup post will be next week, which means there is still time to get us the results of a letter we answered should you wish to be included. Just drop us an email at DramaMamas@wowinsider.com. In the meantime, we have what this week's letter writer calls a "dilly of a pickle." Dear Drama Mamas, I have a situation in my guild that I could use your advice on. I am a senior officer in my guild, and some troubling news came to my attention a few days ago. It seems that one of my guild members is selling gold in real life. He's been using guildies' cool downs and the other guildies' professions to make items to sell on the AH. Originally, I thought it was to make items for himself, but that turned out to be false. The dilemma is that he's been in the guild for a while. He was an original member, then left, and came back about 4 months back. The other thing is that he's not selling the gold on a website. He's selling it to his real life friends because he's on work disability and his disability money will not allow him to play WoW, so he supplements his income by selling his WoW gold. Thank you.
Drama Mamas: Is That Guy abusive or obsessed?
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. First of all, I would like to thank this week's letter writer for the signature that allows me to embed one of my favorite songs of all time. Secondly, I would like to remind you that if you wrote in and your email got answered, you can be included in our roundup column by sending in an update on what happened in your situation to DramaMamas@wow.com. And thirdly, well, there is no thirdly. Let's get right to it. Dear Drama Mamas, About a year ago, I found out that one of my real-life coworkers and her husband played WoW with their in-laws. I was excited! The server I was on no longer had any of my friends on it, as they had either quit or transferred. So I bit the bullet and moved to this new server. Things were going great! We raided, PVPed, quested, and crafted together -- all five of us. We were the perfect 5-man team and never met a dungeon that we couldn't beat together.
Drama Mamas: Making a fresh start after an honest mistake
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. The Drama Mamas roundup post with followup from letters we've featured in previous Drama Mamas columns will run in just a few more weeks. So there's still time to send us an email at DramaMamas@wow.com if you would to share what's happened with your situation since we last heard from you. Dear Drama Mamas, I started playing the game about a month after The Burning Crusade was released. I was still a kid, and gave my toon a foolish name. I know my name gets some weird responses, and when I race change to a worgen in Cataclysm, I am going to change my name. Anyway, I play on a RP server ... which only happened because my brother (who now does not play) randomly picked it when he started. I started playing after him and thus chose the same server. My server is fairly weak when it comes to progression guilds, with only one having defeated heroic Lich King-25 (and it was after 4.0.1). For the duration of my Wrath WoW career, I was in a mid-level progression guild for my server, which got to 11/12 in ICC Regular. I was fairly disappointed, because I really want to get an achievement mount. The guild leader gave up trying to lead, and this week he joined the #2 guild on the server. He said he still plans to lead the guild I am in on his alt, but I know that is not going to work out. You can't lead a progression guild on an alt, while competing for server firsts on your main.
Drama Mamas: Control freak
Drama Mamas Lisa Poisso and Robin Torres are experienced gamers and real-life mamas -- and just as we don't want our precious babies to be the ones kicking and wailing on the floor of the checkout lane next to the candy, neither do we want you to become known as That Guy on your realm. We continue to receive the results of advice that we have given over the course of this column. But we're greedy and we want more! If we have answered a letter from you and you want to participate in our roundup column, please email us at DramaMamas@wow.com. We received the following letter a couple of months ago. It is impossible for us to answer every letter in a timely fashion, unfortunately. Still, we hope that this can still be of some help. Note: "Control Freak" was the subject of the letter writer's email and that's why we chose it as the title, not to be judgmental.
