Michael Dell's been up on stage here at D for a solid 45 minutes and has yet to say anything particularly interesting (unless you consider rattling off numbers about unit growth, margins, etc. fascinating), but the man got his chance during the audience Q&A. Someone asked if he could take Steve Jobs in a fight, and Dell flatly replied, "Yeah, I could take him." Now there's a fight we'd pay good money to see.
[Thanks
Seenew for Jobs' Mii]
Reader Comments (Page 1 of 3)
Ignatius @ May 28th 2008 3:42PM
How about we just throw them both into a snake pit and move on with life?
Exiled Legend @ May 28th 2008 4:00PM
god dell sucks ass
Ray @ May 28th 2008 4:01PM
You are both dumber than the square root of -1:
Your stupidity remains at levels undefined.
Forrest @ May 28th 2008 4:12PM
Actually the square root of -1 is a pretty important concept :P
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imaginary_numbers
Of course if you were being sarcastic I do apologize. The guys up above are definitely douchebags though.
Aguiluz @ May 28th 2008 4:20PM
@Forrest:
*clicks the ! button three times*
Aguiluz @ May 28th 2008 4:32PM
@Seth
That's why I clicked the [!] button three times. :)
Kamokazi @ May 28th 2008 5:30PM
Actually he's got a good idea....and while we're at it, throw Gates, Balmer, Torvalds, Mossberg, and any other "influential" tech person you can think of in there with them.
Gorillamonk @ May 28th 2008 5:35PM
Why not do a Hell in the Cell? Last man standing owns all Computerdom.
peshue @ May 28th 2008 7:02PM
Because it'd be hilarious to see the Jobs get the smirk knocked off his face. I wonder if he'd still wear his turtleneck and jeans to the fight.
Reader @ May 28th 2008 7:29PM
Kamokazi, are you going to fill in the difference of 50 or so billion that Bill gives to charity?
And Ray, it would have been better to say "you are both dumber than one divided by zero"; or if you're cool, say they're Pi over 2 radians.
me @ May 28th 2008 3:42PM
Steve don't fight, that ain't Zen...
Tallest Skil @ May 28th 2008 4:42PM
All that Steve would have to do is say, "Boom" and it's over.
Greg @ May 28th 2008 5:09PM
You never heard of the iRightHook?
It's a one hit ko!
r3loaded @ May 28th 2008 6:59PM
The RDF will prevail...unfortunately. Michael Dell will be leaving that ring with a MacBook Air and some snake oil.
justin @ May 28th 2008 3:43PM
Ballmer would devour his young.
Matt @ May 28th 2008 3:46PM
+1 For Michale Dell
d @ May 28th 2008 4:20PM
-1 fore splling
El Taco @ May 28th 2008 5:46PM
+0 for me being too lazy to click + or -
Aguiluz @ May 28th 2008 6:07PM
@El Taco
-1 for saying "+0" because zero is not a positive, nor a negative number. It is neutral. :)
MBS @ May 28th 2008 8:00PM
@Aguiluz
-0 to you because saying +0 is actually completely valid.
rscott @ May 28th 2008 3:47PM
Steve's already beat him-look at the capitalization of their respective companies...
Jimbo @ May 28th 2008 5:14PM
For every computer Jobs sells, Dell sells six.
Personally, I would rather have a Mac (and would much rather have a Thinkpad), but there's no denying Dell's success. He's like the Henry Ford of laptops.
Blackstar @ May 28th 2008 5:55PM
Hardly. Apple's stock is worth four times Dell right now.
http://apple20.blogs.fortune.cnn.com/2008/05/04/why-apple-is-now-worth-four-dells/
That and Apple is selling 66% of computer's over a grand.
http://apple.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/05/20/0146218&from=rss
Dell is going the way of Gateway someday.
conor @ May 28th 2008 7:45PM
but dell is worth more and that is only through retail dell sells direct mostly.
Blackstar @ May 28th 2008 8:55PM
@conor
I think you need to look at the math again.
Apple's stock worth as of today: 187.010.58 0.31%
as of 04:00 PM EDT on 05/28/2008 in USD (NASDAQ Delay: 15 mins.) : http://finance.aol.com/financials/apple-inc/aapl/nas/balance-sheet
Dell's stock worth as of today: 21.690.20 0.93%
as of 04:00 PM EDT on 05/28/2008 in USD (NASDAQ Delay: 15 mins.) : http://finance.aol.com/financials/dell-inc/dell/nas/balance-sheet
To recap:
187 > 21
Apple's stock is currently worth more than Dell's. And with only Total Liabilities & Shareholders Equity difference of 1.82 B between them. Apple’s balance sheet reveals that Apple has been piling up cash for some time now and cash and cash equivalents are about $19,448,000,000 as of March 29, 2008.
Apple's market value of $158.66 billion is now four times Dell's $38.97 billion.
And keep in mind, this is in a technological sales recession. 4 years ago, Microsoft had 64 billion in cash. Its current balance is currently $26.3 billion. In that same amount of time, Apple's increased it's cash balance from $5.5 billion to $19.4 billion.
In comparison to Dell, their notebook and other handheld device sales were flat at $3.8 billion, and its desktop PC business took it on the chin, with sales down 18 percent. Storage array sales--mostly disk arrays, but also including storage--were flat in the quarter at $600 million worldwide. The company's overall sales fell by 5 percent to $14.4 billion, and net earnings fell by 33 percent to $673 million. Ouch.
Those are the facts, and no amount of fan-boi ratings will change that. ;)
o29 @ May 28th 2008 11:36PM
As of October 2006, research firms IDC and Gartner reported that Apple's market share in the U.S. had increased to about 6 percent.[64] Figures from December 2006, showing a market share around 6 percent (IDC) and 6.1 percent (Gartner) are based on a more than 30 percent increase in unit sale from 2005 to 2006. The installed base of Mac computers is hard to determine, with numbers ranging from a conservative 3 percent[65] to an optimistic 16 percent.[66]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Macintosh
In the second quarter of 2006 Dell had between 18% and 19% share of the worldwide personal computer market,
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dell
MARSHAK @ May 28th 2008 11:56PM
*BNL* Oh if I had a million dollars....
I'd buy you a house...
Blackstar @ May 29th 2008 8:58AM
@o29
And when computer market share equals stock market share, that will mean something.
Saying "Dell has more computers out there" is meaningless and is completely beside the point of company worth, asset and current sales volume. Bottom line is Dell's sales numbers are down across the board, while Apple's is thriving. And not just Dell, many PC manufactures' numbers are also lower as well.
Not to mention Dell's recent legal problems related to it's business practices: http://www.pcworld.com/businesscenter/article/146371/court_finds_dell_guilty_of_fraud.html
Sorry, but the tired argument of 'XXX have more computers than you' is superfluous and isn't going to cut it.
Eddie @ May 28th 2008 3:49PM
I laughed.
*promptly forgets about this headline*
Scott @ May 28th 2008 3:50PM
I think we should give them 4x4's with nails in them and let them go at it in a swimming pool filled with tigers!
MeatyPi @ May 28th 2008 3:53PM
and leopards, panthers, cheetahs, and jaguars!
Ray @ May 28th 2008 4:02PM
Atari Jaguars. THAT would scare the crap out of them.
Big Ed @ May 28th 2008 3:51PM
This argument is pointless. Everyone knows Kaz Hirai could flip both of them over and hit their weak points for massive damage. His war scream: "Riiiiiidge Racerrrrr!"
SirCrumpet @ May 31st 2008 5:39AM
Sorry, but last I checked neither was a giant crab...
Jacques Auef @ May 28th 2008 3:51PM
It's easy to beat Steve. Just punch him in the pancreas!
Pochi @ May 28th 2008 3:54PM
Oh MAN...
rock99rock @ May 28th 2008 4:06PM
Wow. Low blow.
Engadgetluvsappl @ May 28th 2008 4:18PM
ROFL!
coffee @ May 28th 2008 4:20PM
omg i laughed, i'm sorry! rofl
Jason @ May 28th 2008 4:23PM
You are a douche bag. Watch some one battle though cancer, then die and see if you think such jokes are still funny... or better yet, get back to summer school you twat.
Engadgetluvsappl @ May 28th 2008 4:36PM
Jason, calm down lol.
The execution of this comment was perfect... I'm still laughing at it.
Merci, Jacques.
Jonathan-DBOSS @ May 28th 2008 5:00PM
hahahahahahahaha!!! MEGA ROFLWITHABONER!!!!
Jacques Auef @ May 28th 2008 5:08PM
Jason,
Even Randy Pausch thought the comment was funny.
MBS @ May 28th 2008 5:22PM
@Jason - I totally agree with you, that was wrong. If he was Lance Armstrong I would totally kick him in the ball...
Zoinks @ May 28th 2008 11:24PM
I lawled!
AlekZander @ May 28th 2008 3:53PM
In a physical fight maybe, but Jobs can kill with his mind.
Darkroom @ May 28th 2008 4:03PM
or his nasty bitch-stare, head-about-to-explode-tantrum because the iPhone IS STILL NOT READY PEOPLE! WORK HARDER! *whip*
justin @ May 28th 2008 3:54PM
Dear Steve Jobs,
Hey champ, hustle over here and take a knee. It looks like the D in "All Things D" stands for disembowel in your case Jobso. You have multitouch on a Dell, iPhone 2 pics are leaking and now Michael Dell says he could hold his own in a round of fisticuffs? It's like you're on a C-Net produced episode of the Real World and you're about to get kicked off the show for being a pantywaste.
Ugh, I swear, you've gotta get back on your game. This is just like high school, Steve. Michael Dell is the high school football hero with a long history of inbreeding, you're...well...you, and I, your adoring public, represent your high school sweetheart you're pining for with every gadget you conjure up.
Sweep me off my feet Steve. Fight for my honor.
And then take me to see 'Indiana Jones', I'm free Friday Night.
xoxo,
Your Loyal Libertarian Damsel In Distress Loyal Apple User
Pochi @ May 28th 2008 3:55PM
I feel that you are probably a psychopath.
That is all.
Abuzar @ May 28th 2008 6:04PM
WTF, was that?
I swear you are probably like those weird lesbo goth girls in high school.