It is with great sadness that I write you at home to your Gmail account to inform you that I am intending to sell your ring on Ebay and we will part ways. You see, ours was a mixed relationship to begin with. You have your Windows 7, your Linux, your original Android phone from T-Mobile in the UK. I have my iPhone, my iMac and everything good that's Apple (and even a few pieces that aren't).
That's why I know it'll never work out between us. According to a recent study from Retrevo, iPhone owners believe that a "cool gadget" makes a person far more attractive than the measly doctorate you've spent years studying for. Every time we are together, I can't help but shudder over the fact that your Android phone is not of the latest generation.
So forget the four years of history between us, the months of separation due to our being in two different countries, and the fact that you are a wonderful, kind, sweet, and intelligent man with a bright future ahead of you. I have someone else I think the world of, and it is my iPhone. Now if you'll excuse me, I must go watch adult material and post up an ad at Match.com for someone with a 3GS.
Your dear departed Megan
P.S. This letter is satire, I'm not dumping my fiance over his gadget preferences. Love you, honey!