Army spy blimp to launch within weeks: 300 feet long, $500 million, 'multi-intelligent'

It can't go faster than 34MPH and it's already a year late for its planned deployment in Afghanistan, but Northrop Grumman's Long Endurance Multi-Intelligence Vehicle (LEMV) is now set for its maiden flight. The test run is scheduled for sometime between June 6th and 10th over Lakehurst, New Jersey, whose residents ought to be forewarned that it is not a solar eclipse or a Death Star, but simply a helium-filled pilotless reconnaissance and communications airship that happens to be the size of a football field. After floating around for a while, the giant dirigible is expected to journey south to Florida, where it'll be fitted to a custom-built gondola that will carry the bulk of its equipment, and by which time her enemies hopefully won't have come into possession of an air force.