Phat Loot Phriday: Helm of Maddening Whispers

When we last left our heroes, they were giving chase to Abercrombie but took a few moments to make a silly Yak pun or two. Because we couldn't let something like a yak mount go by without at least a few jokes. Because yaks, people. Yaks.

Abercrombie couldn't run any further. He stumbled to the ground just as Throgg descended on him.

"Wait, wait," Throgg said, standing up straight and planting the tip of his sword in the ground. "Not sure if killing you or capturing you. Wait a second for my friends to catch up."

"Why have you people been hounding me?" Abercrombie complained. The mage's voice was surprisingly high-pitched and whiny.

"You sent a series of undead to kill a bunch of people," Throgg replied. "Ah, here they are now."

Abercrombie got to his feet while eyeing the approaching band. "Four against one. This seems like it would go poorly for me in a fair fight."

"So help me," Miranda said quickly, pointing a threatening finger, "if you cackle and say 'That's why it's not a fair fight!' we will just kill you now."

"That does lead to the question of why I'm not dead," Abercrombie said, brushing his robes down around his hips smoothly.

"We want to know what Sylvanas had to do with this," Lolegolas said. "She claimed to have never met you."

"So, what you're saying is that you want me to betray a master of the undead," the human mage said slowly. "Loyalty could be rewarded with eternal life, and disloyalty punished with eternal torture. What exactly do you think you can do to me?"

Lolegolas pursed his lips, and shrugged. "Not much. But a while back, we picked up this Helm of Maddening Whispers. It's not eternal torture, but it sure will feel like it before too long."

"It sings something called Friday for hours," Throgg agreed. "Bad news, bear."

Abercrombie peered at the two uncertainly. "Look, you're barking up the wrong tree. This is hardly a secret deal, anyway. I just rented a little help from Sylvanas's team. It wasn't like we were bedmates or something."

"Someone on a Team Undead is selling val'kyr help?" the Gilnean suddenly popped up. "Why?"

Abercrombie licked his lips. "Look, man. I recognize what country you're from. And as a general rule, you don't go wobbling about to worgen about Forsaken plans. You get all wolfy and bitey pretty quick."

The druid sighed. "I promise not to get bitey. Now, spill it. Who's selling val'kyr?"

Item description: This is old gear, so we're doing this short-form. The Helm of Maddening Whispers drops from Cho'gall in the Bastion of Twilight.

Phat Loot Phriday brings you the scoop on some of the most ... interesting ... loot in the World of Warcraft, often viewed through the eyes of the stalwart Throgg and indelible Lolegolas. Suggest items you think we should feature by emailing mikeg@wowinsider.com.